It’s a hard-knock life

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On a Thursday night, as we sipped our beers at a local bar and the conversational naturally turned to my favorite subject, my girlfriend almost complained that if she and her boyfriend “don’t have sex for like two days, he goes crazy and whatnot!” Well, frankly, I would — and have — too. And let’s face it: sex is definitely up there with air, water, food and shelter. Now, I am sure that the sound of annoyance in her voice probably comes from the memory of an uncalled for tantrum thrown by her boyfriend, but it has nevertheless caused me to want to dispel two myths about girls and sex.

Myth #1: Girls don’t yearn for sex nearly as much as guys do — actually, barely ever.

Wrong.

We want and need it just as badly, too. Probably more than boys think, and more than our culture makes it seem. Long has lived the illusion that only men have physical needs all the time, while women don’t care much for it and always need to be convinced, seduced or intoxicated into helping their male mates satiate their desires. But guess what? We just don’t always tell you because this knowledge may give you more power than we’d like you to have.

Myth #2: The game is only rough for the boys — girls get it whenever they want it. Again, wrong.

Unfortunately, the fact of life explained above is even more painful for single ladies. Unless one has had the great luck of finding a talented fuck buddy who is at her beck and call, the everyday need for a good lay is just downright frustrating. It really is more work than it appears.

Good looking single guys with bedroom skills don’t just stand outside our doors all day, every day. We actually have to put in the effort and go out and fish for them. Usually, the formula includes a good amount of primping, a fair amount of alcohol, alertness and a good eye to spot potentially qualified volunteers and faith that the sex gods will be on our side tonight.

Sadly, they aren’t always on our side. And when they aren’t, life is a little sadder (and so are our vaginas). Moreover, as a buddy of mine pointed out, we could theoretically get it in any and every day. Theoretically, we could easily find some guy to take home at any time. However, as he also later put it, we don’t exactly have the “pussy is pussy” mentally. And so we often go home, alone, and unsatisfied.

So there you have it: two truths about the ladies. Gentlemen, help us out next weekend.