For those of us who play pickup basketball in the RSF, we know that there are many unwritten rules on the courts. These rules are generally amalgamations of common sense and gym etiquette, standards that aren’t too hard to figure out.
But over the past few months, I have noticed an increase of people oblivious to the hidden rules. Perhaps it’s just me who sees this trend, but either way, it’s annoying and something must be done.
By the power vested in me by the Daily Californian, I have decided to spell out some of these laws on print to shed light on the offenders who unknowingly break the rules in order to prevent any more of these offenses from happening in the future.
So let’s begin:
1. Thou shalt not leave the basketball courts after calling for the next game.
After calling next, there are too many people going to lift or run on the treadmill instead of waiting beside the court. When one calls next, he or she must treat the vow with his or her life, not leaving the post at all costs. The absentee causes confusion on the courts as to who’s playing next, and the last thing anyone wants during pickup basketball is a logistical problem about who’s playing next.
2. Thou shalt bring an extra T-shirt if his shirt becomes drenched in sweat.
Basketball is a contact sport, and nobody knows wants to touch someone’s sweat. And there is nothing more grotesque than you accidentally touching the shirt, leaving with a layer of someone else’s sweat on your hands or arms. It is not hygienic and disadvantageous for the other players. So for the love of God, change your shirt.
3. Thou shalt not over-accessorize.
I saw a man at the RSF with a headband, shooting sleeves on both arms and shin-high basketball socks. Who are you, Allen Iverson? Unless you are really, really good, nobody should dress to impress on the basketball court. A simple T-shirt (a dry one!) and shorts would do just fine.
4. Thou shalt not be a ball hog.
This should be common sense, but incredibly there are people in the RSF who don’t realize basketball is a team sport and think they are the second coming of Michael Jordan. Another problem is that most of these ballhoggers are not very good at basketball, making the problem even worse. Everybody came to play some fun pickup basketball; let’s spread the wealth and share the ball — and the fun.
5. If your defender is a lady, thou shalt have some respect.
Since only a small proportion of the basketball players are female, it is rather uncommon to play against a lady. Unfortunately, some people like to take advantage, powering down the lane past the often smaller defenders for easy layups. Come on guys, let’s stay classy when on the court with a lady.
6. Thou shalt not be pushy to your stranger teammates.
“You double-team, you double-team!” “You, get in the paint!”
Is that necessary? Especially to someone you just met five minutes ago? We want to have fun, not have someone tell us how to play the game. I understand that you want to win, but dude, take a chill pill and communicate to your fellow teammates in a nondictatorial way.
Comment Policy
Comments should remain on topic, concerning the article or blog post to which they are connected. Brevity is encouraged. Posting under a pseudonym is discouraged, but permitted. The Daily Cal encourages readers to voice their opinions respectfully in regard to the readers, writers and contributors of The Daily Californian. Comments are not pre-moderated, but may be removed if deemed to be in violation of this policy. Click here to read the full comment policy.