At a whopping $1 billion profit in three days, “Grand Theft Auto V” has captured the title of the fastest-selling product in entertainment history. Hold your applause, because the new massive setting, improved graphics and thrilling plot could cost you. With the pressures of Berkeley filling your schedule, it’s natural to feel the urge to escape to Blaine County and relieve some stress with Franklin, Trevor and Michael. But while the soaring numbers of BAWSAQ are getting you high, we’re here to bring you back down. Next time you hit up GameStop on Shattuck and you reach out for that shiny new case, we suggest you try to resist … at least for now. Here’s why.
1. Midterm season has arrived.
You’ve completed all of your tasks, reported to your superiors and are awaiting your next assignment. No, we’re not referring to your classes — we’re referring to your GTA-V mission. Unfortunately, with all of your efforts dedicated to your avatar, you’ve forgotten about tomorrow’s paper and next week’s exams.
Do yourself a favor and wait until you steal an A before you steal a car.
2. PS4.
If the increase in your GTA bank account is worth a decrease in your GPA, consider how much better it will be on the new PlayStation 4 console. The new console is set to be released on Nov. 15 with a much more advanced system. Although there has been some debate about whether GTA-V will be made for the new console, we’re confident that it will not only be made but that it will be well worth the wait.
3. Blurred lines …
If you have a history of referring to your friends as Zelda or Mario — or of mistaking a stray dog for a Skyrim wolf — we would recommend refraining from ever playing GTA-V. You may have an issue separating the video-game world from the actual world. According to recent news, a freshman from Auburn University reportedly stole a pickup truck, held a woman against her will and crashed into no less than nine other vehicles in an attempt to live GTA-V. Needless to say, the Auburn police weren’t as understanding as the police of GTA’s Los Santos.
Image Sources: oO_GiuLiAnO_Oo, smbuckley23, camknows, phphoto2010 under Creative Commons
Contact Tara Lookabaugh at [email protected]