Sutter Brown re-elected as California’s first dog

clog.sutterbrown2.federIncumbent Sutter Brown won Tuesday’s midterm election against Winslow and Newsome Kashkari, Neel Kashkari’s two Newfoundlands, emerging victorious in what can only be described as a fur-raising race.

A self-described “people person,” the brown-and-white Welsh corgi looks forward to another term as California’s first dog. He has told the press that he is excited for many more years of long walks through Sacramento parks and tummy rubs from state representatives in between meetings. Brown plans to hit the ground running and is already starting to formulate an agenda of goals for his time in office — a term that he knows will not be easy.

Voters connected with Brown decades ago when he took a firm stance against the fat cats that presided over American politics for centuries. The first dog knows that these are the citizens who elected him, and he has already made promises to do everything he can to stay true to his humble, working-dog roots and the voters who gave him this opportunity.

A member of California’s thriving Whig party, Brown is known by those close to him to be “practical.” Voters know that he will not be “carried away by the barking constituencies” — something they have come to solidly count on him to do.

In the nasty world of politics, it is comforting to know that at least one dog will take the stand against special interest groups, not allowing himself to be burdened by unnecessary dogma. Supporters are hoping that Brown will get straight to the big dog bones now that he knows that his time in office is secure.

The re-election of Brown to the position of California’s first dog is also a historic re-election. Never has a Zen Jesuit served such a lengthy term in any elected office in California, let alone in the prestigious position of first dog. This election cycle also saw record expenditure levels by candidates from all parties. Brown’s edge, however, came from his appearance at multiple doggy dinners and parks, where his superior oratory performances were always met with loud barks of approval.

Image Sources: Neon TommyJose Solorio under Creative Commons

Contact Rachel Feder at [email protected]