Blood is the new black

Sex on Tuesday

boni-mata

The first time someone told me they wanted to drink my period blood from a chalice, I suddenly grew extremely close to proposing marriage on the spot. Maybe it’s the teenage girl in me talking, but there’s something about the surge in vampire films that has given blood sucking and hunting a renewed social capital in the depraved sex lives of our generation of perverts.

Vampires, of course, aren’t a new thing. There’s been a new version of Dracula every decade since Bela Lugosi, culminating in Jonathan Rhys Meyers’ creepily hot performance in the NBC series no one watched. Blood sucking is perhaps at its finest when David Bowie and Catherine Deneuve make out with slashed-up, oozing necks in “The Hunger.” Since then, the vampire trend has exploded to a ludicrous degree, with “Buffy,” “True Blood” and “The Vampire Diaries” making red waves of bloodlust only to be outshined by the pungent musk of the Twilight saga. In a large part of pop culture, in other words, blood has become the substance everyone wants in his or her fangs and veins. Blood isn’t something to be shunned but rather to be sought out and fawned over: Its scent alone causes visceral reactions of the best kind. While admitting that the media’s vampire obsession might be nothing more than a passing trend in camp and kitsch, anything that encourages the unabashed indulgence in human carnage can’t be all bad.

Whether you’re a fan or not, blood is having a renaissance, and with that comes the intersection of the reign of the pussy and all of its monthly blood-dripping majesty. Either that, or the previously squirmy and squeamish among us have finally realized that nothing need stand in the way of more sex. In my previous genitalia and sex surveys, I found that the jury was still out on the question of period sex for most parties. Among those who have sex with women, 35 percent said they partake in menstrual sex “all the time.” Among menstruating women, one fifth claimed they were averse to the act of menstrual fucking, while most others claimed it depended on the partner’s “gross-out” tolerance. But is a bleeding vagina merely an obstacle to overcome for the sake of crippling horniness — or can the dripping, red pussy become something to lust after and put on the pedestal beside its prepubescent, porny cousin?

“So, what are you thoughts on period sex?”

“That’s, like, a fetish, right?”

“Not exactly.”

There could very well indeed be a fetishistic element to the phenomenon of period sex. Coagulated blood isn’t necessarily on everyone’s menu, just like some weirdos prefer their steaks well done rather than rare. I’m a vegetarian, but I’m wont to make exceptions for the uncensored, X-rated human body on occasion. New York magazine’s “Blood Hounds” coins the term to refer to those who are “obsessed” with period sex or, more generally, men who actively seek it out and prefer it to more vanilla sex styles. The article mentions a “hardcore connoisseurship” that involves embracing the most intimate product of female biology: uterine bloodshed. This type of sex isn’t for the faint of heart, mind you. Many women I talked to referenced a certain bodily shame or insecurity with having their menstrual fluid on full display during intimacy of this sort. Fear of grossing out a partner could lead to a less-than-favorable experience in the red-soaked sack, so it’s important to make sure both parties are down for the cause before engaging in this high-reward albeit high-risk activity.

“I’m just not into period sex.”

“Why’s that?”

“I feel like the blood is toxic to my dick.”

In speaking candidly to various people about menstrual sex, I never thought I’d need to debunk assumptions such as these. While a woman on her period is more susceptible to STIs and other blood-borne or bacterial infections because of a dilated cervix — which is why it’s important to not skimp on protection, especially because pregnancy is still possible at this time — having period sex is otherwise a perfectly healthy activity for both partners. Comments such as “It’s just nasty” don’t progress efforts to reverse common conceptions that the bleeding vagina is a “dirty” or “toxic” space — one worthy of scorn or neglect for about 20 percent of the year.

“What would you say to the fact that a lot of women are significantly hornier on their period?” Eyebrows were raised. “Tell me more,” they say. Not only do women often turn into cats in the heat while menstruating, but heightened sensitivity and blood flow to the pelvis can significantly increase pleasure during sex. Though the all-natural, all-woman goo seeping from those pussy lips can serve as added lubrication, if either partner is put off by blood in a characteristically anti-vampiric way, period sex can be rendered significantly less “gross” via diaphragms, Soft Cups or a diva cup.

“I vant to drink your blood,” Dracula whispers in my ear as he runs his fangs lightly across my neck. He can smell the blood between my legs and knows he’s going to be fed soon. I might be scared of the prospect of this type of sex, but my partner’s thirst turns me on. Period sex doesn’t have to be a messy blood bath for it to be hot, but there’s something incredibly appealing in the carnal embrace of the bleeding body. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with being averse to the prospect of menstrual sex, but it’s high time we stopped thinking of it as a “dirty” or “toxic” act. Period.

 

Thank you to the Occupy Wheeler movement for providing a space to discuss these issues.

Boni Mata writes the weekly Sex on Tuesday column. You can contact her at [email protected] or follow her on Twitter: @yungEwaste.

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  • Lady Krampus

    You can always tell when they’ve never spoken to an actual Sanguinarian, only “interviewed” people who are WAY too into fiction.

  • the devil

    I’ve heard women decline sex during menstruation because it made their period stop and start up again later, prolonging the cramps and bleeding. Enjoy your cramps.

  • Ben Franklin

    I agree. Whether you can see fluid or not see it, a shower afterwards is always fun. As far as this spoiled generation is concerned, i don’t watch TV, so I don’t understand the need to watch the stuff they do. It all seems like a waste of time.

  • what….