“Notes from my journal” is a series in which contributors share excerpts from their private journals, diaries and notebooks.
Journal Entry 1
Jan 22, 2015
This is the beginning of my second semester here and although I am fresh out of high school I have already completed my general ed (breadth) requirements. At the beginning of the school year, my plan was to major in Political Science, minor in Philosophy and rush through my college undergrad in 2 years. However, that first semester, Fall 2014, was one of the hardest, worst semesters I have ever had. The classes in retrospect weren’t that hard, I mean I passed all of them, but mentally I was not there. I hardly went to class, I never did any of my readings and I spent most of my nights smoking pot and listening to Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon. By the time the semester ended I went through a good 2-3oz. of weed and managed somehow to get a C+, C, and C- in my classes. Socially the first semester started out very rough. My roommates and I were completely different people and we did not go out to eat together or really do anything as roommates. They already had their group of friends set mostly because of the people they knew, or more like knew of, in high school and gravitated towards them. We were/are nice to each other, but other than pleasantries needed for peaceful coexistence we don’t really interact. So as my two roommates left for classes and later sorority events, I was left/stayed in the dorm room with my laptop on and the door closed. I mainly ate dinner alone and had polite conversations with the few hallmates I would run into.
So far it has only been 6 days since I returned to Berkeley and so many things have already started. The first night back I went to hang out with everyone in a hallmate’s room. After a little while we brought out Lil’ Marcus! Lil Marcus was a handle of vodka a friend had stolen from one of the Frats earlier in the week. That is how I found out we were headed to a frat. I did not have any of Lil’ Marcus because he was really shitty vodka and I don’t even like vodka that much to begin with. So I waited until we were at the frat and there is where I got a lil bit drunk. A lot of the time at the frat I was hanging around a guy I like mainly because we had been texting each other almost everyday during the break. One of my friends pulled me aside and told me that if I wanted something to happen then it would, I just needed to hang with him that night. That is exactly what I did.
The next day we just hung out as usual. The next afternoon after my classes, I went back to Clark Kerr and went to go smoke a cig on the yellow bench and like before I invited him to come join me. He doesn’t mind cigarettes or the fact that I have picked up the habit again. He showed up and gave me a really sweet birthday present. I had shown him one of my classtime doodles/drawing so he gave me a sketchpad from this lady on Free and For Sale. She will draw a design on any notebook you give her and on mine I have two black and white jellyfish.
Tonight Lil B was performing here on campus – Memorial Glade – and was giving a free show. After dinner I was still feeling antisocial and just wanted to curl up in my bed with music. Lil B is very offensive and degrading in his music and rap… I don’t like rap, I was really only going because my friends were. As I was leaving the dorm to go to the concert, a friend tells me that he has some hash. I asked how much and he said he only had about $15 dollars worth which was 1 gram. I agreed and we decided to meet all the way down College to what ended up being Alcatraz. While I was walking to the bus stop, the guy I like text me “Where are you?” and I told him that I was going to pick up and I should be at the concert soon. Usually the 51B is pretty fast so I thought it would be rather quick, I was wrong. First the bus was really late, almost 30 minutes late, and we had to take a detour because they were shooting a movie and had to close down the street!! I thought that was super cool and am really curious to know what movie it was. Anyways, I finally got to my friend to pick up and we talked about rap and how the dirty rap is what’s influencing all this brother violence and then said goodbye. From there I had to wait another 20 minutes for the next bus. By that time everyone had left for the concert except the guy I like, so I met him back at the dorms and didn’t go to the concert. We spent the night together instead.
Katherine Mitchell is a contributor to The Weekender. Contact her at [email protected]