The 10 people you encounter on a plane

Emilia Malachowski/Staff
Emilia Malachowski/Staff
Emilia Malachowski/Staff

People do strange things when you place a large group of them together in tight spaces. The fact is, the probability that you will meet some interesting characters is extremely high. You will likely understand what we at the Clog mean if you hop on a plane this spring break, especially if you’re flying out of the Bay Area. Below is a list of the 10 different personality types you will see on any flight.

Bless You: This is the person who cannot stop sneezing or coughing. It seems that he or she is unable to perform either function with a closed mouth. Germ sharing is not a fun activity, especially at 30,000 feet in the air. Public health majors, we wish you luck.

The DJ: The captain shouldn’t be able to hear that you are listening to Rihanna remixes all the way in the back of the plane. This person’s Beats headphones are usually extremely worn out from repeated use.

All Plugged In: This person is typing away on a laptop, wearing headphones, texting, watching a movie, using a GPS, reading an e-book and traveling through the cabin on a hoverboard. This is the kind of person to have every type of of mobile technology known to man. The iPhone 7? Yup, they’ve got it.

Eager Beaver: Hey, we get it. You can’t wait to come back to the troposphere. It would be great if you didn’t run over those small children to rush to the front of the plane.

The Hibernator: You may have to tap them on the shoulder to make sure they’re alive. This kind of person is likely to have earplugs, an eye mask and a blanket to wear over their head in order to shield themselves from the outside world.

The Crying Baby: Babies are cute. Crying is not. Crying in a public space that is so confined annoys us all to death, but it’s acceptable because babies are still cute. Although, the Hibernator has the right idea.

The Recliner: Why do you have the feet of your significant other wrapped around your neck? It would almost be romantic if it weren’t for the smell.

Flatulent Frank: Yikes, this person probably shouldn’t have scarfed down that bowl of chili and beans before the flight. Fellow passengers can guess what he or she ate without actually seeing it, if you know what I mean.

The Pilot Comedian: Please, don’t. We are thousands of feet up in the air in a tiny tin can with an engine and wings. Mr. Pilot, do not joke about the turbulence.

The Talkative Passenger: Well, these earplugs are useless. This person is talking to you even when you are pretending to be asleep. You’re already trying to drown out the pilot making a “Mayday” joke in the background. Don’t make this any harder than it has to be, please.

Contact Karina Pauletti at [email protected].