Snapchat guide: How to have a successful story

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Snapchat has quickly become one of the most well-loved and widely used social media platforms among students at UC Berkeley. According to the latest Whatsgoodly poll, 60 percent of users claimed Snapchat was their favorite social media network. Facebook came in at 13 percent, Instagram at 22 percent and LinkedIn  at 5 percent. Snapchat is definitely more entertaining than LinkedIn, but how do you get people to actually watch your story instead of just clicking through it? We at the Clog have a few tips to help you craft a masterful Snapchat story.

A Snapchat story is a lot like a Facebook status: You’re reaching a fairly wide audience and people don’t necessarily have to pay attention to it. You have to be choosy about what you post because, in general, no one gives a shit what you ate for lunch or what show you’re watching on Netflix (unless it’s “Vanilla Ice Goes Amish” — the people need to know). Stay away from sharing mundane details of your life. This isn’t to say that a pretty shot of the Campanile or the sunset over the bay won’t kill on your story. It might be basic, but everybody at UC Berkeley has a mega amount of school spirit and probably posted the same picture on their story.

Don’t shy away from meme utilization. There are so many wonderful options to choose from these days: Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer; deep analysis of “Spongebob” episodes; “Arthur” screencaps; Damn, Daniel; what are those (still relevant in our opinion); don’t ever talk to me or my son again and the ever-present Pepe. You can reference a meme in earnest or snap a shitpost and everyone will laugh because memes are universal and of the people.

Try to include as many uncaptioned selfies of yourself as possible in your story to emphasize how vain and insipid you are. A good time to do this is when you’re bored in class, deciding whether to get Yogurtland or Yogurt Park, or some other equally vital life decision. Don’t forget to make sure they’re all set to last for 10 seconds to maximize the amount of time people spend angrily staring at your face before they realize they’ll need to click through in order to escape.

Snapchat has a great wealth of hilarious filters to choose from when posting about how deeply unhappy you are. Offset your misery with the light-hearted dog or bunny filters. Use your caption to make sure people know that you’re suffering inside and that your soul is slowly being overcome with self-loathing from procrastinating your take-home midterm until the day it’s due. Then use the Viking filter to show you have a sense of humor about it. Haha!

Lastly, make sure your story is a reflection of you! When you feel like poop, post a picture of your actual poop floating in toilet water. When you’re happy, post a video of you talking about how happy you are. If you’re a memelord, let the world know!

Happy snapping.

Contact Sasha Ashall at [email protected].