Hype. Sick. Lit. High-key. Low-key. Fire. Trash. Swag. These words make up the influential, intelligent, insanely efficient slang of today. This is the slang of 2017.
But what about the slang that was big in 2010, or in 2002, or even in 1997 (we know, that was way too long ago and probably irrelevant to us youngsters)? We UC Berkeley students really have to bring back that groundbreaking, historic slang to pay homage to all the teens and tweens of the old ages.
Honestly, this is a symbol of Berkeley. Berkeley is the home of the Free Speech Movement, a time of hippies and happiness and change and excessive use of the word “groovy.” We need to use “groovy” at UC Berkeley to keep our history alive and our students constantly ready for change, especially at a time like this in the world.
This term means, according to the extremely prestigious Urban Dictionary, “has been owned,” and it is apparently used by “geeks, nerds, dorks, and gamers.” In the event that you do something stupid, any surrounding person can shout, loudly in your face, “You just got pwned!” It was an insult that hurt the hearts of many, and it could live in one’s memory for years to come. Let’s bring this shit back!
“Your outfit’s so fly!” Like your outfit is literally flying away. It’s flying away into the clouds. That’s really what this means.
This ancient relic is another heart-wrencher. Every younger sibling understands the sincere pain of this one. When you didn’t understand something your older or younger sibling did, you’d instantly be coined a “n00b.” You had no knowledge to stand up for yourself. You were just a n00b. For the rest of your life. Forever and always.
“Psych” is pretty annoying, which is probably why it’s nonexistent now. Every time someone fooled someone else, they’d yell “PSYCH” way, way, way too loud. Like, is that really necessary? We get that you succeeded in fooling someone else. Good five you. Does it have to be screamed, though? So, never mind, definitely don’t bring this one back.
We don’t think anyone has ever felt cooler than when saying “take a chill pill” to another person. When someone is freaking out and stressing way too much about something, just tell that person to “take a chill pill.” You’ll sound really, really cool and not annoying at all, we promise (wait, is “cool” still a thing? What is still a thing? We don’t understand anything!)
Please bring back this slang, UC Berkeley students! There is nothing more important in the entire world. Really. Plus, it’d totally groovy of you.
Contact Esmé Brachmann at [email protected].