Power ranking: overrated Berkeley things

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Zainab Ali/File

Berkeley is great. Like, really great. But some parts of Berkeley life have definitely been over-exaggerated and are assuredly overrated. We at the Clog ranked how overrated some of the most popular parts of attending UC Berkeley are, based on three metrics: hype level, shittiness and popularity. Bonus points for Instagram-ability!

Memorial Glade

Hype level: 4/5. Memorial Glade always looks so inviting when you walk by it between classes or when someone puts it on Snapchat. Also, anyone who owns a hammock won’t stop talking about how great it is to hang out on the Glade.

Shittiness: 1/5. As long as it’s not muddy, Memorial Glade is a lovely place to spend an afternoon.

Popularity: 3/5. While all the shade can be taken at times, it’s not hard to find a nice spot to sit, unless the Quidditch team is practicing.

+2 for Instagram-ability.

Total: 10/15.

Artichoke Basille’s Pizza

Hype level: 3/5. It looks so cool! And it’s so cheap! Artichoke’s is recommended often to new students and visitors because of its proximity to both campus and the Units.

Shittiness: 3/5. This is a point of contention, to be sure. While one Clogger defended Artichoke’s passionately, another brought complaints of burnt crust and congealed cheese. If you have a spare $5, test it out for yourself.

Popularity: 5/5. While there’s usually at least a few people in line at any given time, swing by Artichoke’s any given night Thursday through Saturday (or during any day-drinking bonanza) to find a crazy crowd. It’ll feel like everyone you know is there with you!

Total: 11/15.

Moffitt Library

Hype level: 4/5. If anyone wants to study with you, chances are good they want to study in Moffitt — it’s the library du jour.

Shittiness: 3/5. Moffitt is always crowded! The trash cans are always full! The chairs are weird and the lighting is bad!

Popularity: 5/5. It is absolutely impossible to find a seat in Moffitt unless you’re willing to walk in circles for at least 20 minutes.

Total: 12/15.

Going to a football game

Hype level: 5/5. What could be more fun than watching Cal football? Everyone seems to love it, and they even spend whole days partying in celebration any time there’s a football game.

Shittiness: 5/5. If you’re in the student section, you don’t get to sit down! That’s bullshit! Also, everyone in the student section is extremely drunk and belligerent, and if you’re not, it can be awful. Football games are also approximately 2.5 hours too long.

Popularity: 3/5. First-years make up the majority of football game attendees (because they get free tickets). Other than that, it’s really only actual fans in the stands.

+1 for the Instagram-ability (if you’re wearing super-cute Cal gear).

Total: 14/15.

Don’t fall into the trap of thinking these things are worth the massive amounts of hype! Stay smart and stay cool, Bears.

Contact Jamie Campbell at [email protected].

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