Disappointment, again: A poem

6 bus
Mark Unger/Staff

In the simplest terms through which I can comprise these thoughts:

 

Wake up, and there you are on my mind,

I check my phone for you,

Plan my day around you,

I don’t want to go if I know you won’t be going with me,

I’m scared to make my schedule without consulting yours,

Scared to ever leave you waiting because I know you won’t.

 

I organize my life around you,

Your cruel, unwavering drive isn’t easy to keep up with,

I don’t see you one day, you simply drive by me the next,

Without ever communicating intelligently,

You leave me and move on, just for the day,

It’s impossible to keep up with you.

 

You let me down every week,

I get a message — “be there in 10,”

And you still don’t show up,

But I can’t walk away from you,

I can’t untie myself from you,

You keep giving me just enough to keep me on the hook.

 

You never let me keep my head high,

You make my flaws so obvious, my imperfect thighs and stomach, and their jiggle,

You make me think that I can’t do it on my own,

That I can’t make it on my own,

You give me just enough, so I give in to you every day,

And I waste my time on you, waiting.

 

You can make me feel special

But then turn around and let someone else in,

And still I let you control my day,

I try to move on and get through life on my own,

But you never let me forget that I need you,

Some part of me needs a part of you.

 

Whenever you get news that I’m out with someone new,

You don’t accept my Clipper Card the next day, you control me.

Despite our tragic love affair, Bus 6,

You’ll always have my heart.

Yours forever,

Priyanka Athalye.

Contact Priyanka Athalye at [email protected].

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