“On the first day of Christmas, UC Berkeley gave to me, a GPA of 2.3 …” All right, that was morbid, but it’s pretty apparent that the holidays in Berkeley aren’t always full of joy and cheer. While our grades are almost set in stone at this point, there are a few things that the UC Berkeley campus is lacking that can be changed for all the holidays coming up. Chancellor Christ, we’re not asking for much. Just bless us with a few holiday gifts, from you to us.
Evans Hall renovation
Evans Hall is the ugliest building on campus, but nothing has been done about it. This eyesore has sat untouched for too long now. With its large number of windowless classrooms and an ugly green-gray exterior, the entire UC Berkeley campus (students and teachers alike) are dying to see a change.
Acai bowls galore
You would think that, given the abundance of health nuts and trendy food places in Berkeley, we’d have an established (and LEGIT) acai bowl joint. But nope. SoCal natives, your cries have been heard. UC Berkeley’s putting an acai bowl place on its official holiday wish list this year. Let’s see if the holiday spirits deliver.
Santa, grant us with a juicy double-double and two orders of well-done animal fries this winter. The absence of an In-N-Out in Berkeley is just wrong. There are too many reasons as to why we deserve one.
News flash! Even if our beloved president doesn’t believe so, global warming is real, people. And if the heat wave this past semester wasn’t enough to convince you of it, then we don’t know what will. The fact of the matter is that there’s not much we can do to reverse the damage done to our planet, but we can still install air conditioning! It doesn’t look like it’s getting any cooler, Berkeley. We think it’s time.
A meme studies department
There’s nothing that the UC Berkeley campus is collectively more passionate about than memes. After recent rumors flooded the internet of a new meme studies department on campus (Another news flash: It was a joke, people! We can dream, though, right?), UC Berkeley and the outside world got just way too excited. Come on, Santa, it’s time to make history and give the people what they want.
A Big Game win
Ouch, too soon? Regardless, we need to stop ignoring the fact that Stanford has won eight years in a row, and if all it takes is a little holiday magic to push us over the edge, we’ll take our chances.
Let’s cross our fingers and hope that jolly old Oski grants us all of our wishes!!
Contact Camryn Frederickson at [email protected].