Transience (and the 626): A poem

New Media Producer/Courtesy

Because I desire that you derive a clear and concise understanding of the piece at hand, I find myself placed with a responsibility. I endeavor to provide you with the building blocks, perhaps, as I believe you may find it difficult to understand what you are about to read.

The Fung Brothers happen to be Asian American YouTubers who document, in comically entertaining manners, the frequently overlooked experiences of people who look like me. Keep that in mind and go forth.

My 2o-year existence renders me unable to speak definitively on topics humans have failed to quantify for centuries. If anything, my inexperience arguably invalidates the point of this piece, but jokes on you — I’m going to do it anyway.

So as my mind wanders aimlessly from point A to point B, from I’m so trucking hungry to what am I even doing with my life tbgluckingh, I wonder at the passing of time. Memories of all kinds rise to the surface and threaten to drown my sense of reason with lmao I probably shouldn’t have done that OK let’s get back to studying oh fffffffuuuu my mind needs to shut the buck up.

Chucking poop.

Now that I’ve successfully managed to get myself to exist in a state of complete and total cringe-worthiness, some discordant sound generated by my vocal cords leaves everyone around me quite shook. These individuals give me pitiful glances, probably believing me to have succumbed to an inordinate amount of stress. An incredibly friendly girl tells me that I can do it but lmao I figuratively mucking can’t and gather my belongings.

As I proceed to wander aimlessly around campus, I take my phone out and send a GIF of brown ice cream to my roommates. I giggle to myself, lauding how plucking clever I am.

Oh, come on. You have to agree.

I’m a genuinely funny person.

In any case, the blue check mark is still a blue gucking check mark, and I sigh in disappointment. My attempts to seek some sort of outlet for the storm raging inside have failed. Unfortunately, my roommates conveniently also have responsibilities (like yeah wtf) and I tell myself I should probably go study because pain is temporary and GPA is forever (yafeel?).

Jokes on me, because pain is forever, in some sense. I mean, if you figuratively and literally trip and fall on your face as much as I do.  

Yeah, I know I’m fucking funny.

Alas, my mind has regrettably lost its ability to shut up. I’ve found meditation wonderfully soothing to my frequent inclinations toward insanity, so I find some greenery, sit down and close my eyes. Takes me a few moments to get in my zen, but it happens and BAM!

Guess who suddenly has become one with everything?

Lmao not me. The patch of greenery chosen has surprise surprise, way too many people. I find that I am decidedly giving all fucks possible about the people looking at me and judging me. It’s time to go home.

Another discordant sound, this time generated by the vocal cords in my stomach, emanates from my torso. Thankfully, I am alone, so nobody is there to hear my body’s natural reaction to desiring sustenance. Unfortunately, I am alone, so nobody is there to share my apparent disappointment for Berkeley’s dearth in quality food choices. Why?

Because I just wanna hit Santa Anita maaaaaaall, after I eat out in Monterey Parrrrrrrrk.

Realizing that I have, in fact, taken my childhood for granted, I curse the order of things in this world and lament how fucking far the nearest Factory Tea Bar is. I suppose it’s true, then. You really can’t take the 626 out of people, and yeah, Diamond Bar is sooooooooooooo ghetto. RIP the old Overheard page.

All jokes aside, transience, according to Merriam-Webster, is “the quality or state of being transient.” Like that tells me what the word means.

Upon a second Google search, I discover that transient, according to Merriam-Webster, is “passing especially quickly into and out of existence.”

Oh, come on. You have to agree.

I’m so fucking clever.

P.S. Google “626 explained fung bros” for optimal understanding.

Contact Ru-Ping Chen at [email protected] and follow her on Twitter at @roxychen_56.

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