Freedom of a finsta: A guide to creating a fake Instagram

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Sunny Sichi/Staff

The college years are hard — there’s this weird balance between desperately wanting friends and hating everyone at the same time. You’re starting to face the realities of being an adult in the competitive world of the Bay Area. You have to deal with ridiculous course loads, figuring out your future, applying for things, working a job (or two) — the list could go on. What we’re trying to say is, there are a lot of things to complain about. Rather than take out our frustrations out loud, many of us take to Instagram. Not to our “rinstas,” or real accounts that anyone can follow. No, we take to our finstas, or “fake Instagrams.” Follows are reserved for a few trusted friends, most of who also have finstas of their own, who we can trust to not share our deepest secrets and frustrations that we post. It’s a place to keep up with friends from high school, complain about relationship issues and post drunk selfies that we certainly do not want family members or future employers seeing.

There’s no freedom quite as great as the freedom you have on your finsta to express yourself. For those of you who don’t have finstas but are considering making one, we at the Clog have created a list of easy tips to follow so you can make an incredible finsta.

1. Think of a unique username that you identify with.

Maybe have a pun on your name, your middle name or some part of your name in it. And honestly, it doesn’t even have to be related to your name. It takes a while to lock down a good finsta username, so don’t be afraid to change it around a bit.

2. Pick a profile photo.

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Awful selfies of yourself, a picture of when you were young, an obscure meme or a fictional character you relate to all work for a profile picture! But don’t use a nice selfie, professional LinkedIn photo or a nice graduation picture — you get the gist. You don’t want to give off an air of being cute, normal or put together at all. Finstas are a place to lay out the contents of your mind and soul, which are messy places.

3. Make your first post.

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Many like to say something along the lines of, “Look who got a finsta! And apologies in advance for all the rants that will most definitely happen.” You don’t have to follow this, and your first post by no means has to hook people in. Make it as arbitrary as you want.

4. Don’t be afraid to say whatever you want.

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Seriously. This is your place to RANT. Angry at your friend for flaking on you for someone else? RANT. Pissed off at the fact that you have two essays due and a midterm all on the same day? RANT. Mad that they got your boba order wrong? RANT. Be as mean or whiny as you want to be. It’s better to let it out than keep it bottled up inside. No one will judge you for it on here because they’ll all be doing the same thing.

5. Don’t let people you’ll complain about follow you.

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Oski doesn’t let Stanford Tree follow him for obvious reasons. Don’t let people who annoy you follow you! Finstas are safe places to word vomit and just let every selfish and unfiltered opinion and feeling out. This isn’t the place for frenemies.

6. Keep it on private!

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It’s only safe if you keep it private and allow just a limited number of people to follow you. As UC Berkeley snowflake socialists, the concept of “private” is hard to grasp, but we’re pretty sure Marx would have had a private finsta to complain about capitalism if Instagram had existed during his time — so don’t let your socialist tendencies hold you back.

7. Be careful where you post!

Our last piece of advice for you friends is to never accidentally post a finsta post to your rinsta. And if you do, catch the mistake quick! We know from experience that it can be extremely embarrassing when a picture of you after you’ve cut your bangs too short is accidentally posted to a real account. Don’t be that person. Finsta is a great place to roast your friends, but don’t let it go public!

College life can be hard, and often one feels like they have no one to talk to. Finstas provide a space to just let your emotions and embarrassing moments out. It’s almost cleansing to have a place where you can post a low-quality mirror selfie of yourself brushing your teeth in the dorm bathrooms without judgment. So if you’re in dire need of an outlet for your frustrations, follow this little guide and go off!

Contact Sunny Sichi at [email protected].