The four stages of going to your 8 a.m. classes throughout the semester

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Olivia Staser/Staff

Fall semester is here, which means it’s time to regret the class schedule decisions we made just a few months ago. Did you really think you could handle those back-to-back-to-back-to-back lectures? Was it the best of ideas to take that weeder course? And let’s face it — 8 a.m. classes are always, always, a bad idea. Here are the four stages you will inevitably go through during the semester in attending these early morning classes. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

Showing up on time

It’s still early on in the semester, so you show up bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready for the start of a great new semester! You’re all ready to go, breathing that fresh morning air, with a sunny smile that’s at odds with the gloomy weather. If you aren’t a freshman, you could probably still pass for one with this level of excitement and energy. This will definitely carry on throughout the rest of this semester!

Showing up just a little bit late

It’s Berkeley time, and lecture has just started, and you slink in just a minute or two late. Maybe you overslept a little or spent a bit too long getting ready in the morning, or maybe you walked just a little slower to class. You’re not getting burnt out — this is fine. It’s only a few minutes, and you’ll pick things up by the next class anyway. This won’t become a habit. This definitely won’t become a habit.

Showing up to class (more or less on time) to nap

Honestly, it’s way too early in the morning for this, and the fact that you actually showed up to class is a pretty big accomplishment in and of itself. Your very presence is a gift — and you do learn by passively absorbing information by just being in the room, right? We learned about that in high school: osmosis.

Staying in bed

Let’s face it — no one’s actually meant to be conscious this early in the day. This half-conscious moaning in shame as you realize it’s 8:30 a.m., you’re late to class and might as well just sleep in is the natural state of being for a student. This is how we’re meant to live. And maybe don’t bother setting your alarm for next time. We all know you aren’t going.

Of course, this cycle may repeat itself throughout the semester, especially when you realize you might have missed a bit too much of class during your bouts of truancy and again as attendance shoots up during the post-midterm panic season. Repeat as necessary until the semester ends and you realize you’ve gone to maybe a third of the classes.

Oops.

Contact Jonathan Lai at [email protected] .