Quiz: Which form of public transportation you should take based on your laziness

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Yukun Zhang/File

We all have those days when we’d rather dissolve into a puddle of flesh than walk from VLSB to Stanley or from anywhere to Foothill. But then there are days when we have so much energy that we willingly make the trek to Foothill. Take this quiz, and the experts at the Clog will tell you whether you have the energy to walk around campus or sit your ass down on some public transportation.

  1. What time did you wake up today?
    1. 7 a.m.
    2. 2 p.m.
    3. I didn’t
    4. 10 a.m.
  2. On a scale of 1 to 10, how bad does your pinky toe hurt at the moment?
    1. 10
    2. 3
    3. Childbirth
    4. It doesn’t?
  3. Your roommate asks you to move 3 1/2 inches to the side because you’re blocking their path. How do you respond?
    1. “No”
    2. Ask them to move you for them
    3. Tell them if you move, then all your organs will fall out of the hole in your back
    4. Move only 3 inches
  4. What item of the following would you use on a giant mf-in’ spider on your wall?
    1. Your trusty shoe
    2. A fly swatter
    3. Your parents from across the country
    4. Nothing because it’s too far and #notallspiders
  5. Ok, UC Berkeley, it’s time for dinnerrrrrrrrr! What’s on your menu?
    1. Every single item at any given dining hall
    2. Taco Bell on Durant 
    3. The granola bar you were supposed to eat for breakfast
    4. Homemade whole-wheat pasta with a zesty tomato and herb puree on top
  6. Which of these campus bathrooms is your go-to?
    1. Dwinelle Level C
    2. Wheeler with the heavy ass doors
    3. Somewhere in the lower floors of VLSB
    4. MLK Student Union
  7. If you sit down and stand up, do you feel like your back is about to go out?
    1. Always
    2. Only when my birthday is near and my dentist’s receptionist calls me old
    3. If I do it three times fast
    4. It’s been out for a while now
  8. Your homie calls you and asks if you want to hang out. What do you say?
    1. “Sorry bro, I’m busy.
    2. “My cat got stuck in the couch, and I need to dig her out, maybe another time.”
    3. “I have a midterm in four hours, please leave.”
    4. “My mom said I can’t.”
    1. Walk! You seem like someone who has enough energy to haul ass up UC Berkeley’s hills, whether you got 20 or two hours of sleep the night before. And if you’re not, it’s good exercise, so you can offset the guiltiness you have for not having exercised in three years.
    2. Take the bus! You seem like someone who’s too lazy to walk 10 minutes from your apartment in Downtown Berkeley to Sproul after your daytime adventures. Plus, the bus is free, has seats and is the one form of public transportation that gets you as close to your destination as possible. This is the one for you, bud.
    3. Take BART! If you live in Berkeley and want to get to somewhere on campus, you can always teleport to the Downtown Berkeley station and then to your desired location. Ah, the magic of public transportation!
    4. Uber through campus! We know this isn’t public transportation, but you aren’t having any of it today, so treat yourself to a luxury ride via Uber (Black). Worst case scenario, you can always piggyback on the back of the Loop golf cart if it comes to that.

Contact Pooja Bale at [email protected].