If UC Berkeley is the shining college on a grassy, green hill, Stanford is none other than the pile of dog poo at the bottom. The rivalry between the two schools has been present on both campuses for a long, long time. But, despite the prevalence of anti-Stanford propaganda on our campus, a Reddit user posed the question: “Why do some Cal people talk about Stanford so much?” We’ll try our best to give you a comprehensive answer.
Deeply rooted in tradition is the tug of war between UC Berkeley’s and Stanford’s subtle flex complexes. UC Berkeley wants to trash talk Stanford as much as it can in order to assert its dominance and flex that it’s the No. 1 public university. Does Stanford hold a title that prestigious? We think not. They’re just a crummy private school. And they’re not even the best private school. They’re number seven after Princeton, Harvard, Columbia, MIT, University of Chicago and Yale. Sucks to suck, Stanford.
But here’s a side that many don’t consider: maybe UC Berkeley secretly… loves Stanford? It may seem like a purely hateful relationship, but we at the Clog definitely see a lot of evidence pointing to Stanford being our undercover lover. Why else do UC Berkeley students get flustered when they see the color red? Because it’s the color of Stanford, and it’s the color of love. You know how little kids tease their crushes because they don’t know how to express their love? That’s Berkeley to Stanford, two star-crossed children. Plus, no two colleges can both have mascots that look so terrifying. It’s only fate that one looks like it’s out of a stalker horror movie and one looks like a mangled car wreck. We’ll let you decide which one is which.
Of course, it could also be UC Berkeley’s highly stressful environment. Students here are always on edge and don’t always know how to take out their anger in constructive ways. That’s where Stanford comes in! UC Berkeley kids love to take their frustration and grief out on their lovable rivals at Stanford. Failed three midterms consecutively? “Gosh, I hate Stanford.” Missed the bus and now you’re going to be late for class? “OMG, this is all Stanford’s fault!” We suggest trying it sometime.
While the strife between UC Berkeley and Stanford will likely never die, the Clog’s parting words for you are, “$tanfurd suckz.” Go Bears!
Contact Pooja Bale at [email protected] .