The Backstreet Boys Take a Wrong Turn on Their Newest Album 'This Is Us'

In times of substantial environmental change, we are only rewarded three options: move, adapt or die. As one of the more curious of musical species, the boy band, faces extinction, we have seen the few that remain choose among these less-than-favorable choices.

We've mostly seen the death of boy bands. Gems like LFO, 98 Degrees and BBMak have packed up their matching muscle tees, withered away into obscurity and are now buried deep in that 1990s time vault. However, some lucky individuals have moved on, away from their pasts of over-peroxided hair and man-on-man dance moves, and into their own limelight, like Justin Timberlake and Jesse McCartney.

The Backstreet Boys, however, have refused to budge or quit. Though they took quite a hit when Kevin Richardson -the "mature one" most notable for his caterpillar eyebrows-left the band, the boys, all grown up, have released their newest album: This is Us.

The title of the album implies an introduction is in order, as if we have heard nothing of the Backstreet Boys before this album. "Who are these dapper young men on this album cover and why do they look so moody?" We know the group, but it seems we do need to be introduced to their new sound.

The boys got help from producers like RedOne, who helped Lady Gaga creep up the charts, and Jim Jonsin, who was behind T.I. and Soulja Boy in some of their most recent hits. T-Pain even introduces the not-so-fab four to the Auto-Tune in "She's A Dream" which is … strange. But all these big names leave behind is their influence-there is no trace of the Backstreet Boys anywhere in this album.

Each of the songs sounds like a blatant and ill-executed nod to various Hot 100 tunes, and the result is 12 watered-down R&B dance "hits" that will struggle to inspire even the drunkest of clubbers to take the floor. The album opens with "Straight Through My Heart," an over-synthed, Prozac-induced alternative to Jay Sean's "Down."

"Bye Bye Love" is eerily identical to Chris Brown's "Forever." And in "Masquerade," which begins exactly like Ciara's "My Goodies," Nick Carter calls himself a soldier boy and his girl "shorty." Who taught him these words?

The most disturbing of the songs is hands down "PDA," which has the boys, in the chorus, listing the places in which they would touch their lady friend's "booty." Shall it be the club, the restaurant, or the movies, A.J. McLean?

It's not that a musical revolution was ever expected from BSB. It's just that their desperate attempt to be hip makes them more susceptible to be the butt of jokes. It's like the "Dungeons and Dragons" nerd from high school. He'll get beaten up no matter what, but if he starts dressing like a b-boy, the whooping will be that much rougher.

This is Us acts as a misguided rebranding of BSB. Though Backstreet may be back (alright?), there is very little here that is larger than life. The album is more radio camouflage than anything else, a transparent attempt to adapt to the pop music scene that they dominated nearly 10 years ago. The songs are all digestible, yes-some even listenable and danceable. However, fans and haters alike must ask themselves which would be worse: an aging boy band that dates itself by creating the same exact sound as it did in its peak, or four thirtysomethings desperately trying to push their way into a hip music world that has deemed them obsolete.

Tags: THIS IS US, BACKSTREET BOYS