The Cal family is going through a nasty divorce. It's getting ugly between Daddy (academics) and Mommy (the athletic department).

Money has gotten tight lately, and it's made Mommy and Daddy argue more. No, no, it's not your fault, kids (students, student-athletes and fans).

Daddy doesn't think it's right that Mommy is asking for more alimony. But Mommy says she needs that money to support her current lifestyle. It's a necessity, not a luxury, she says.

If Daddy can't be self-sufficient, then why should Mommy have to be?

The metaphor could go on forever, but-lucky for you-it won't. Just one, er, two more sentences, I promise.

In this public divorce proceeding, Mommy and Daddy need to remember that the kids are the most important thing. Divorce can hurt, so they have to be careful.

Last Thursday night, the Academic Senate voted to recommend to the Chancellor to end the university's financial support of Intercollegiate Athletics at Cal, abiding by the general rule of thumb: You can't give money away when you are $150 million in the hole.

The decision, however, is not binding. Making it worth as much as this column, which is to say, nothing. Yet, at a time of forced furlough days, increases in student fees and class sizes as well as course reductions, the reason for the Senate's vote makes sense.

This fiscal year, the athletic department claims that it is receiving a total of $5.8 million in loans from the school in addition to the $7.7 million that the school plans to pay.

This university was founded as a place of higher education, not Division I athletics. Without a school, classes and teachers, there can't be collegiate teams (exception: USC).

The Senate at UC Berkeley needs to protect this school's reputation as the best public school in the universe. I want my degree to be worth more than a Ben Braun commemorative booster seat. And if that means the school stops subsidizing athletics, then so be it.

It seems every campus department has taken cuts, so why not athletics?

Other schools have taken dramatic steps. Washington cut its swimming programs, while Maryland cut its football budget by $300,000.

I believe that Cal's athletic department can be economically self-sufficient, and the Senate thinks that it needs to be in order to help save this school. So how can the athletic department do it? I have some ideas.

Cutting women's programs is out of the question because of Title IX. I am not interested in cutting men's programs like track and field, tennis and golf, although this may be the most viable and immediate fix. It's just too easy to say, "Your sport doesn't make money. Goodbye." Sports provide entertainment, some more than others, but I think that they are a valuable part of the Cal experience.

It's going to take more creative ways to make the athletic program self-sufficient than cutting a whole team.

Get rid of meaningless expenses. Cut Andy Ludwig. Cal has had three offensive coordinators in the last three years, and the Bears still run the same plays. Save the money on his contract, or at least don't give him a headset. Those things are expensive.

And there's a ton more that can be cut, but let's focus on making money.

Take a page out of the Milwaukee Beers' strategy-sell more ad space. The AXE Hair Gel student entrance. "The Clutch Protection of the Day," brought to you by Trojan Magnums. Imodium D sample packet night. People love that stuff.

Cal should try to get a cut of the UCPD's profit from all the drunk-in-public citations they issue to students before home games. Football games provide them with students, and the UCPD should give the athletic department a take of the racket's profits.

Think old school-every dollar counts. I would pay $3 for one of Sandy Barbour's snickerdoodles at a bake sale before every home game. Tell me you wouldn't buy a Cal linemen swimsuit calendar for $10. Can you say gold mine?

It's time that the athletic department takes one for the family. So, get it together for the kids.

Tags: CAL ATHLETICS, CANNON FODDER