Online Exclusive: Male Sex on Tuesday

As a heterosexual male with limited experience, I approach the subject of anal sex with trepidation. I thought this same trepidation was widely felt among my peers, but man was I wrong!

I started talking to people. Gay people, straight people, guys and girls to see what they thought and what they had experienced.

One young man had been receiving a blowjob from a girl he barely knew. Enjoying the treatment, he started to relax and get into it. But all of a sudden his partner took her index and middle fingers and stuck them right into his anus. It hurt and soon all his excitement wilted.

"What the hell are you doing?" he asked.

"Most guys like it," she replied.

According to him, that was the end of their relationship. The lesson being: unsolicited anal entry can seriously jack things up.

A homosexual guy talked to me also. He said that the biggest hurdle in the gay world is coming out of the closet, not necessarily the consummation in rear entry.

He said that it hurt real badly the first time, "but it was all about going slow. Gay men are just more prepared-we walk around with lube."

"I never walk around with lube," I thought.

"So we just get used buying that stuff and it is just easier to buy other things like toys," he added.

Could it be that anal sex is like smoking a joint?

Does doing it from the backside incite unknown sexual promiscuity and kinkiness much like some argue that smoking marijuana is one rung up a ladder to heavy drug use? Is it this same fear that keeps heterosexuals from trying it out or rejecting it, as in the case of the first person I spoke with?

On the other side, there are the women.

A woman I spoke with on campus was very open in sharing her experiences.

"Have you had anal sex?" I asked.

"Yes, a bunch of times, but the last time it hurt real bad."

She told me she had kicked her boyfriend off of her during sex because it was so painful. In so doing, she somehow managed to kick him in the testicles, leaving them both writhing on the bed. Here, the lesson to be learned is that even with talk and repetition, anal sex is a very delicate dance.

But if of the three people I spoke to, three had engaged in anal acts, then why do I perceive such a taboo surrounding the subject? As far as I can remember I have never seen anal sex portrayed positively in any media.

Never while reading the classics have I come across a hot scene where someone hit it from the backside in a horse-drawn carriage. Never watching the Simpsons did I hear Homer talking about the delights of anal sex. While radio commercials often talk up the condom there is never any reference to their use in anal activities. And I have certainly not seen a billboard advertising Viagra to keep you going through bout after bout of rectal romping.

Maybe I am just a slave to the mainstream but never have I seen, heard or read anything positive about anal sex. All I ever heard was that homosexuals engaged in it, and occasionally I would catch a glimpse of it in a rented porn tape-but porn is out of the mainstream.

Even among my friends it was never the hot topic. We would all talk about blowjobs and sex but only a few would really get jazzed up over the kind you did where the sun don't shine.

All the while, there are large swathes of people doing it, guys and girls both giving and receiving. So if you are curious, maybe you should just open up a dialogue with your partner. He or she might be too.

Who knows, maybe it will turn you on to a world of sexual delight you never dreamed of.

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