Down and Out and Overworked

When Curtis Dozier started out as a first-year graduate student in UC Berkeley's classics department four years ago, he could not explain why his body would often start shaking when he sat down to study.

Dozier's long hours and heavy workload began to overwhelm him; soon the attacks worsened, he experienced stomach pain and his heart would race.

"It was making it impossible for me to do what I was here to do," he says.

At the time, Dozier did not know he had depression and anxiety disorder, two common mental health disorders that affect some 38 million Americans a year.

These conditions can cause restlessness and sadness and interrupt daily activities like sleeping or eating.

In Dozier's case, the disorder took a heavy toll on his school work.

"I would have panic attacks while I was sitting at my desk or when I would sit down to study. I would spend the whole time beating myself up because I wasn't doing enough," he says. "The anxiety that I was feeling about whether I was performing adequately became crippling."

Dozier says working alongside faculty in his graduate program prompted him to start setting unrealistic expectations for himself.

"(The faculty) treat you to some extent as a colleague, and they're always able to go as far as you're able to go," he says. "So you never feel like, ‘Oh, I've done enough.'"

Dozier says he feels his experience may not be uncommon among graduate students-mounting pressure to excel can have damaging effects.

Last December, a study conducted by a graduate mental health task force discovered that more than half of the 3,100 students surveyed felt so depressed that it was difficult to function.

Unlike undergraduate students, who have peer-counselors and resident assistants in their dorms, graduate students have "no sort of safety net," Dozier says.

Comparing himself to faculty-many of whom have been working in their fields for years-began to make Dozier, who had just begun his graduate studies, feel anxious and depressed.

As his readings piled up, Dozier says he began feeling bogged down and all he would think about was failure.

Although friends recommended he seek help, Dozier says he was reluctant.

"I thought that I didn't need it, that I shouldn't need it," he says.

Dozier is not alone-there is often a social stigma attached to seeking counseling help.

"The most important thing is to seek a doctor or counselor's help because you can't do it yourself," says Temina Madon, a recent graduate who spearheaded mental health awareness efforts on campus. "These are not medical conditions we can just fix ourselves."

Students and university officials have amped up efforts to tackle the growing problem.

Earlier this month, students passed the health fee referendum, allocating $8 each semester out of a $43 mandatory student fee to boost mental health services at the Tang Center.

When Dozier finally made a trip to the Tang Center after his first semester, he returned for several counseling sessions and was eventually referred to an outside therapist, who he continues to see today.

Now, Dozier is being treated with medication and also fits time in his schedule to practice yoga and train for triathlons.

Being part of a nonacademic group is very helpful in dealing with anxiety and depression, he says.

Students with mental health disorders who need more than counseling may also qualify for accommodations, such as a reduced course load, with the Disabled Students' Program.

These students' disorders are usually chronic and persistent even with treatment, says Aaron Cohen, a specialist at the program.

Still, Madon says that although interacting with friends and seeking help can be difficult for students suffering from depression, not being afraid to talk about the condition is a crucial step.

"Be forthcoming about your concerns," she says. "Talk to other people, get help."

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