I received an e-mail last week from a group of roommates with questions about their differing labia minora. The inner lips of the vagina can be minimal and tucked within the labia majora or they can protrude beyond the outer lips, they can be symmetrical or one can hang a little lower. These are all degrees of normal. You could be born this way or it could be caused by a number of other factors such as changing hormone levels. The idea that women who have longer labia minora are sluts is a myth. There is nothing virginal or pure about hidden inner lips-plastic surgeons just want you to think so.
Plastic surgeon Dr. Gary J. Atler practices in Beverly Hills and, from his picture, appears to be forcing a smile while facing high velocity winds. He has a labiaplasty Web site that claims protruding labia minora "may cause embarrassment with a sexual partner or discomfort in tight pants, with sports, or during sexual intercourse." But if a man can remain confident, comfortable and athletic with a sack of balls between his legs, a woman can handle a little skin.
Most of the labiaplasty Web sites suggest loads of women are engaging in this "corrective surgery" but in the land of reality, where we all must live, the American Society of Plastic Surgeons has not released any numbers on labiaplasty and can only claim that plastic surgery in general is on the rise. Labiaplasty is not the new boob job. It's simply one of the most recent exploitations of a woman's insecurities.
All vaginas are different-really different. I would even venture to say that vaginas vary more in color, scent, shape and size than any other body part. Just because you know how to make yourself or someone else with a vagina orgasm doesn't mean you have mastered all that is "pussy." I own one, and I still don't think I could draw it perfectly without cheating. The best way to learn about the love box is to find a diagram online and see for yourself. Don't just look at one vagina, look at a gaggle-no two are alike. If you're lucky enough to have your own, grab a hand mirror and take a gander.
The female "package" is the vulva. The outermost layers are the labia majora. The labia minora are the stretchy inner lips connected to the clitoral hood covering the clitoris. Nestled within are the urethra and the vaginal opening.
There is a school of love-patch professionals who claim all the vagina's parts are analogous to features in the penis. For surely, as we all know, it's always about the penis, nothing exists but the penis-penis, penis, penis. The clit is really just a mini-penis, the clitoral hood is foreskin and so on-but the vagina is not just a mangled cock and balls.
That doesn't make it a flower either. I've seen enough pictures of pussies this week to know. Sure, there are similarities-intricate folds and layers, a variety of colors and shapes, a specific scent and it sort of "blooms" when it's excited-but you can't tease a flower until it cries mercy, and I haven't seen a bouquet of vaginas on Telegraph ... lately.
It would be so much easier to comprehend if a vagina were just a hole between your legs with a neon sign flashing "Insert here!" But for some reason, which I won't claim to know, the vagina has turned out to be much more than that. So don't butcher it, embrace it.