Brian Ly/Staff

This fall, CS61A has more enrolled students than any other undergraduate course at UC Berkeley, with a roster of a whopping 1098 people. The Daily Clog investigates what this entails.

Kai Ridenoure produced this video.

Sources: Students enrolled, CS 61 class statistics, Berkeley’s undergraduate class numbers, Biology 1A, Nutritional Science 10, Economics 1, Cornell, Virginia Tech

Contact Alex Mabanta, Chloe Hunt and Shannon Najmadadi at blog@dailycal.org.

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Sarah Branoff/Staff

If you happened to look oceanward from a Berkeley rooftop at some point yesterday afternoon, chances are, you noticed something strange on the horizon. If you dared to venture over to the Berkeley Marina, your puzzlement likely grew — no, you were not hallucinating. Yes, those actually were gigantic octopus-shaped kites flying hundreds of feet in the air. No, we’re not kidding.

The 28th annual Berkeley Kite Festival, hosted by Highline Kites, is being held at Cesar Chavez Park at the marina this weekend, attracting thousands of people from around the Bay Area. That means that if you didn’t get a chance to attend on Saturday, you can have your go today! Yesterday’s windy, overcast weather wasn’t exactly conducive to the sunny Saturday that was hoped for but it was pretty darn conducive to flying a kite. (It doesn’t look to be a sunny Sunday either, so be sure to bring a jacket and blanket.) People of all ages scattered across the park, flying kites in the form of dragons, beavers, spinning squares, giant Finding Nemo fish and (our personal favorite) Cal flags. Obviously, the Cal kite sailed high above the rest. Literally. The options for activities at the Kite Fest are endless: Not only can you marvel at the World’s Largest Octopus Kite, but you can buy kites, fly kites, compete with your kites, make kites … KITES. You can even watch kite ballet. (Watch this footage from the 2007 Kite Fest and prepare for your mind to be blown.)

If the physical act of flying kites doesn’t appeal to you, maybe the free samples at food trucks, live music and pure comedy of watching grown men throw their entire bodies into lifting a thin piece of plastic a few feet in the air, only to have it come crashing down, will. Cal student Cam Zachary says that the sky full of colorful and unique kites “brightened a cloudy day” and that it was “truly a rare spectacle for Berkeley.” Events like these remind us just how much fun it is to channel your inner kid and how necessary it is to take a break from the bubble that is the Berkeley campus. So get over to the Berkeley Marina between 10 a.m. and 6 p.m. today and attempt to get your own kite up off the ground. Trust us — it’s a lot more fun when the greatly helpful windy weather has your back.

If your interest has been piqued, check out this link for today’s schedule of events!

Contact Sarah Branoff at sbranoff@dailycal.org

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For better or for worse, sometimes real life is stranger than fiction. On July 19, like something out of a Jan de Bont film, a shirtless, barefoot man stole an AC Transit bus in San Francisco’s Transbay Terminal and drove it 100 miles north on Highway 120 before being caught and swiftly arrested by officials. The reason he was shirtless and barefoot remains speculative. But it’s practically a mathematical certainty: The amount of clothing a perp is wearing is inversely proportional to how interesting we find him or her.

AC Transit spokesperson Clarence Johnson reported that the agency knew something was wrong when an emergency alarm on the bus sounded around 9:20 a.m. AC Transit’s operations control could see through a GPS tracking system that the bus, usually kept in a parking lot on standby, was leaving San Francisco and heading east.

Now, we can’t speak for everyone, but here at the Clog, an AC Transit bus would be rock bottom on the list of vehicles we would steal if we were criminals — perhaps even after our own mothers’ Toyota Siennas. The suspect, Justin Moss of San Francisco, however, seemed to make the most of it. He embarked on a joyride of nearly two hours before California Highway Patrol officers slowed down the rogue bus with a spike strip around 11:30 a.m. The bus eventually came to a halt with three flat tires, and Moss was quickly arrested near Oakdale, Calif. Moss is being held at San Joaquin County Jail, where he is now facing charges of reckless driving, driving without a license, failure to yield, grand theft auto and felony evasion, among others. There were no passengers on board. And if you were at all concerned about the status of the bus, it is now resting safely in its parking space at the terminal, emerging from the incident relatively unscathed.

Moss has a criminal history, including an outstanding $20,000 warrant from the San Francisco Sheriff’s Department for another account of grand theft auto. We’re no detectives, but what we find particularly odd is that he appeared to have the knowledge and skills necessary to operate a public transportation bus that the average layperson lacks. Could if be that Moss is a former bus driver? Or perhaps this was premeditated bus napping? We are all in the dark regarding the motive behind the act. Could it be linked to fear of future public transit strikes? Was he seeking a free tour of the Central Valley? Or is it just a classic case of distorted YOLO mentality? Your guess is as good as ours. Regardless of the intent, as (almost) always, it could have been much much worse.

Image Source: Paul Sullivan under Creative Commons  

Contact Liz Zarka at lzarka@dailycal.org.

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Jeffrey Joh/File

By now, you all should have heard who’s to follow beloved Mark Yudof as UC president — if not from us, then from your Berkeley email … which of course you check every day, like a diligent student, instead of deleting everything in it right away. So you’ve had time to rejoice (or maybe not so much) over the choice of Janet Napolitano, former U.S. secretary of Homeland Security. The Clog has already worked out why you should celebrate, so all you have to do is sit back, read and shout with joy!

Saying “Homeland freakin’ Security.” When introducing the illustrious almost-appointed member of the UC system, you get to use the words “Thaaat’s right — Homeland freakin’ Security!” every single time. We don’t get some boring academic whose position we forget the next day. Not a former professor or academic administrator. Nope, we get someone from the U.S. FEDERAL GOVERNMENT. Can’t get any fancier than that, can she?

Blowing up Twitter and Facebook. If our new president were less political and more academic, there would be a lot less to rant about through social media. Could you write posts like these about anyone else? Any other figure would make it much more difficult to come up with witty criticisms and jokes for the Internet public to “like” and retweet. And what would our lives be without that ability?

TSA jokes. Speaking of being witty and memorable, Napolitano’s entrance into the academic sphere means you can bust out all those TSA jokes you’ve been holding in. “Time to install metal detectors on Sproul,” or “Does my backpack count as a carry-on?” can now grace your everyday school conversations. And we’re just grazing the surface of potential there. Otherwise you’d just be stuck with “New president. Cool.” You’ll also look super well-informed for knowing who she is; never mind the fact you read it somewhere (*cough* here *cough*).

Feminism. ‘Nough said. Not only is Napolitano a former member of the federal government, her first name also happens to be Janet. Which means she’s a lady — the first woman EVER to be president of the University of California. Girl power, right?! Hillary Clinton may not have gotten the honor of being the first president of the United States back in 2008, but at least the UC system has made progress in that field. If you don’t appreciate the TSA jokes, then this could be something to fist pump over.

There’s probably a lot more conversation to be had over the topic, but hopefully this at least got the ball rolling for Berkeley’s student body. If not, check Facebook (people’s real source of news). People are already posting links about this. Happy politicizing, Berkeley!

Contact Erum Khan at ekhan@dailycal.org or follow her on Twitter @erumjkhan.

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Derek Remsburg/Senior Staff

You don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone. Those words never rang more true until we heard that the Safeway on College Avenue closed its doors yesterday, July 8. The grocery store, located on the Berkeley-Oakland border, will stay closed for a year to make way for a newer, bigger (and better?) store.

Meanwhile, Cal students who frequented that Safeway are going to come back in August not knowing what to do. While there certainly are alternatives, such as Trader Joe’s, some of us grew attached to this store. Maybe this is why:

Bus access. If you lived in Unit 1 or 2, you could easily hop on the 51B, get down College, buy your groceries and miscellany and get back to your dorm in an hour (in that idyllic realm where AC Transit schedules and express checkout lanes collide — it has happened). Now you have to figure out where the other grocery stores are around Berkeley. We challenge you to find the easiest bus route to them.

Shopping dates. Whether it was planning a meal with someone special, stocking up with your roommates or buying that tub of ice cream by yourself, Safeway was a sweet escape on those Sundays when you had nothing better to do than study. College does crazy things like that — turning chores into fun. And it was once so easy with that bus route.

Frat boys will flounder? We’re not sure where you party planners will stock up on “supplies” now. But being the resourceful Bears that you are, we imagine you already have alternate sources of spirits lined up.

Living on the edge. You liked to tell people that you ventured over to Oakland for the day even though Safeway was in a relatively safe place during the day. Also, it wasn’t really that far into Oakland anyway. It was on the border, after all.

But there are a few things you probably won’t miss about this Safeway. Like the strangers who liked to hang out front and ask for money (not a big deal though — it’s Berkeley). The aisles were a little too small, but that’s typical of a city grocery store. And sometimes you might have been tempted by the Powell’s candy shop across the street. Who are we kidding? The negatives definitely outweigh the positives if you ever went to Safeway on College. Any other ideas about what you’ll miss? Let us know in the comments!

Contact Jessica Rogness at jrogness@dailycal.org and follow her on Twitter @jessarogness.

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Andrew Kuo/Staff

We’ve all had some experience with grand theft in our lifetimes. Oh, you haven’t? What about that time you were a small schemer plotting to steal that last piece of cake from the fridge as soon as everyone else had gone to sleep? Or when you moved on to stealing cars and shoving random strangers (in “Grand Theft Auto”)?

Some budding criminals have apparently managed to go in both directions. The crime? Stealing the letters that spell out “University of California” on a sign on the west side of Boalt Hall. It’s an amateur prank — or so it seems. The crime report? Grand theft lettering. Shit just got real. Though ’twas a silly offense — an accurate assessment if indeed it was committed by a Stanford student — we at the Clog know it’s our duty to forewarn you of the even dumber criminals out there. And yes, there are some that are a lot dumber.

Public masturbation. Late last year, a man was riding BART (as any self-respecting Bay Area citizen does) and, for reasons unknown, attempted to hand a cellphone to a woman sitting near him. According to the woman’s testimony, upon rejecting the phone, she observed the man pulling out his sweaty genitalia and beginning activity that understandably caused him to giggle uncontrollably. Of course, the lack of security cameras on BART made it difficult to prove in court — we’ll skip the obligatory joke on how he eventually got off easy.

Extra casino chips. Las Vegas is a solid eight hours away from Berkeley. Yet many people make the trek to catch a show, spin some slots or take their chances at the tables. It’s likely that a good number of Berkeley-ites know the strategy behind counting cards, which is a less than surefire way of beating the house. Quinton Carter, a pro on the Denver Broncos who makes more than $500,000 per year, had a foolproof method. He snuck chips onto the table with utter disregard for the security cameras staring him down — a move that rivals getting hit by 300-pound men on a weekly basis. The big guy went small, opting to only sneak an extra $15 in chips, which we can only assume will pay for his upcoming lessons in common sense.

Dancing. Well, it’s only a crime when it’s done badly — or when you first take a sufficient amount of drugs and break into an unsuspecting Monrovia homeowner’s backyard … and start dancing there. This throws a little cold water on the new-age mantra of “Just Dance,” but it does certainly make for a good story to tell at parties — until, of course, you tell them that it resulted in a stain on your previously groovy record.

Crashing a news van. It might have only been a traffic ticket, and your insurance might have been jacked up a bit. But that was assuming you didn’t previously steal an iPad from a backpack at a nearby Peet’s Coffee, hop into a getaway car like in a well-written Ben Affleck movie and then crash into a news van stationed at a community safety meeting. Naturally, the reporters didn’t have to go far to have exclusive coverage on the stupidity of the story.

Cocaine. This is a bit self-explanatory, but this crook had a revolutionary way of transporting it. Matching the apparent hipster culture of the Bay Area, he avoided the traditional snorting or butt-chugging practices, instead opting to swallow more than two pounds of the snowy powder pellets. In his continuing infinite wisdom, he boarded a plane to Japan from the student-frequented SFO and was stopped. You may have realized that it is somewhat difficult to walk after stuffing 100 pills in your mouth. Even more difficult would be to poop out the pills on the airplane, as the man intended, and potentially reswallow them if he had to.

According to police, the crime of grand theft lettering was committed in the rather large interval between May 1 and June 14 — a testament to the lack of law students who actually attend class. Maybe. But at least the criminals are smarter than these ones!

Do you know of any crazy crimes? Let us know in the comments!

Contact Uday at umehta@dailycal.org and follow him on Twitter at @mehtakid.

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Summer readers, lifelong bookworms, nerds and closet nerds have another reason to be happy in Berkeley. According to Amazon, Berkeley is among the top 20 “most well-read” cities in the country. Though rankings are determined by sales alone, we can experience Berkeley’s bibliophilia just by walking around. Our campus offers many stylish libraries with cafes, gardens and smoking areas in tandem. Northside, Southside and Downtown Shattuck are home to bookstores like Moe’s Books, Bookish, University Press Bookstore, Revolutionary Books and Eastwind Books of Berkeley — where book lovers find fascination like thieves in a gem-studded grotto. At bars and pizza places, locals read. On the bus, BART or ellipticals at the RSF, students read. Even on the Fire Trails, hikers stop to take in the view and read.

Behind the scenes, too, Berkeley is where books are happening. Indie and conventional publishers and distributors are located here, along with luminary writers, poets and thinkers such as Robert Hass, Vikram Chandra, Michael Chabon, Lyn Hejinian, Maxine Hong Kingston, Mark Danner, Robert Reich and Isabel Allende. Berkeley itself has been the backdrop of novels such as “Dhrama Bums,” “The Crying of Lot 49″ and “Telegraph Avenue.” The iconic poem of the Beat generation, “Howl” by Allen Ginsburg, was composed in a guest house on Southside.

Besides school, food, commerce and creativity, what makes reading a Berkeley thing and not a San Francisco thing or even a (sssssss) Stanford thing? Is it because we toiling students want to discover deeper meaning by reading self-help books (for the sterotypical Haas student), Kurt Vonnegut (for the sterotypical hipster) or David Foster Wallace (for the stereotypical English major)? Could it be that we are always bombarded with countercultural, anti-establishment, granola-loving ideas that we are driven to seek out the truth for ourselves? Is it because we can’t wait to find out what happens in the newest episode of “Game of Thrones” or the latest spinoff of “Twilight?” Or is it that the fog, that white blanket of soaring water, that enchants us to snuggle up and play morning and evening with one of the mysteries of life?

Who really knows? Maybe we’ll find out in the next book we come across.

Image source: Sharada Prasad CS under Creative Commons

Contact Josh Escobar at jescobar@dailycal.org.

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For those of you unaware of the typical behavior of certain phallic genitalia — which probably extends to very few of us at Cal — they tend to perspire. The highest concentrations of these moist, dripping reproductive organs tend to be around those who emerge from the RSF without showering, those exhausted from their long climb up to Foothill and the people flyering on Sproul in the scorching heat. This can often cause discomfort and self-consciousness in those who suffer from this affliction. Elmwood’s iteration of the Lululemon Athletica Store, however, has fortunately remedied this problem. Their advertisement for boxer briefs, to the chagrin of many, reads “Got Sweaty Balls?”

This comes as a bit of a surprise, considering that the founder of Lululemon, Chip Wilson, believes in a key value from the Ayn Rand novel “Atlas Shrugged” — that people should pursue self-interest while naked. Naked, synonymous with the phrase “without clothes,” would imply that boxer briefs are not necessary in day-to-day life — yet one of his stores has displayed a controversial advertisement that goes against Wilson’s moral code.

But new evidence has brought to light that this may not be the case — employees at the Elmwood branch were responsible for the content and design of the ad, which was unsanctioned by the corporate headquarters located in Vancouver. A manager who went by the veiled alias “Joshua” called the display “unusual” and hinted that it would only be up in the store’s window for a little longer.

The store is not-so-conveniently located on College and Ashby — far enough away that your balls will definitely be sweaty by the time you finally get there. We at the Clog are currently unsure if they live up to the “Best. Boxer Briefs. Ever.” submotto, but with a price range upwards of $24, there must be something magical about them. There is no word yet on whether the briefs are in fact infused with seaweed, as the company has previously claimed with other products.

Reactions to the ad were imaginably mixed, ranging from outrage to mild amusement — the latter presumably on the part of adolescent young boys. One passerby noted that the campaign fails in terms of its marketing strategy since the great people of Elmwood do not experience sweaty balls. Naturally, the heightened conversation about the subject — for better or for worse — did draw attention to the store. The ad also spawned concerned parents looking for some decency and people who don’t mind a bit of harmless fun.

If you’re interested in sporting some boxers, the sculpted mannequins do look rather good in these multicolored undergarments — and we’re quite sure that their balls aren’t the slightest bit sweaty.

Image source: D.F. Walton (left) and Raj Taneja (right) under Creative Commons

Contact Uday at umehta@dailycal.org or follow him on Twitter at @mehtakid.

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Breaking news: More Bay Area locals will now be able to experience the sweet goodness that is a CREAM sandwich. CREAM, arguably a grand favorite of Berkeley and East Bay residents, will soon branch out and open another shop. While we applaud the expansion of our favorite supplier of sugary amazingness, we question its choice of real estate: Palo Alto.

We know that there are Cal students and alumni who hail from the South Bay and, especially in the summer, they certainly deserve to have CREAM closer to home. But which university’s students will most frequent downtown Palo Alto? Not Cal’s, but Stanford’s.

CREAM is there for us throughout the year during various points of the Cal school year: welcome week (when it’s appropriately summertime), the dead of December finals week, the odd March midterm study break or the farewell May celebration. We love our ice cream, no matter the weather, and we love CREAM even more. It’s disturbing to think that Stanford will have this same dessert opportunity when Berkeley is so well-known for it. Even college students who don’t go to Cal know Berkeley, not Stanford, for CREAM.

We would also like to point out that CREAM’s famous logo is blue and gold, not red and white.

This could be a call for peace between our university and the Farm. Maybe we will see past our longtime rivalry with Stanford and peacefully connect through our mutual love for ice cream.

Just kidding. What world do you think we’re living in? Some animosities can never be soothed — not even by the delight of a mint double chocolate chip cookie sandwich.

Image source: Alan Nakkash, under Creative Commons

Contact Jessica Rogness at jrogness@dailycal.org and follow her on Twitter @jessarogness.

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J. Hannah Lee/Staff

In a surprising turn of events that neither his six-month impending chancellorship nor his half-hour interview revealed, the newly reigning Chancellor Nicholas Dirks is privy to basic human emotions, which include enjoyment, laughter and, most importantly, having fun. On his first day in office, Dirks let his Einstein-like composure slip into what closely resembled a smile when the Cal band welcomed him to the campus’s highest office. Later, in an irrefutable confirmation of our suspicions, he claimed that his motto was to “have fun every day.”

How does this stack up against other mottos we’ve come to know?

“You only live once.” Perhaps the most prevalent one-liner that spread through the world since Drake released his album Take Care a little over a year-and-a-half ago, we can definitively say that Dirks beats out the “Degrassi” star here. Sure, the appended YOLO may have inspired people to live life to the fullest, but what’s living life if you don’t really have fun during that one life? It may take a while for Dirks’ slogan to reach the number of people that Drake’s gotten to, but the former has the advantage of a rather catchy acronym: HFED. We’re sensing a collaboration.

“Don’t be evil.” It may astound you that this replaced Google’s infinitely popular previous slogan of “Search, Ads and Apps,” but they do seem like words to live by. This does clash with Dirks’ message to some degree, because it is entirely possible to have fun while being evil, as evidenced by Dirks’ menacing spectacled stare. Google’s does appear a bit hypocritical because it is the closest thing we have to Skynet, while Dirks holds steadfast to his with that charming smile.

“Winter is coming.” It’s no contest here — Dirks wins by a landslide. It’s been three seasons since Ned Stark first uttered this catchy phrase, and it has yet to manifest itself. Having fun every day does seem like a more family-friendly motto than the dark anxious-sounding motto of House Stark, which has almost seen its entire family slaughtered. The House Dirks would undoubtedly play well in the books — we hear that George R.R. Martin is for once having trouble pulling creativity out of his massive beard.

“Help will always be given … to those who ask for it.” Dirks should pay close attention to this, as he may well make use of it considering the numerous problems he has chosen to tackle. First, he has planned to unceremoniously dispose of all the cards and stationery that bear the title “Chancellor-designate” because he has formally shed that moniker as of June 3. Good luck taking that under the Berkeley sustainability collective.

What do you think of Chancellor Dirks’ new motto? Let us know in the comments!

Contact Uday at umehta@dailycal.org or follow him on Twitter at @mehtakid.

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