DISCLAIMER!!! This story is purely a work of fiction and satire. 7:12 A.M. The Tree rolls out of bed and proceeds to down seven shots of dry gin in order to obtain its necessary Blood Alcohol Concentration of 0.15. To the Tree, it’s all part of a balanced breakfast. Despite Read More…
I had never listened to a single song by the Lonely Island until my sophomore year at UC Berkeley — no, not even “I’m on a Boat.” My roommate Gabby was the one to open my eyes — rather, my ears — to the hilarity of the band’s music. After watching a Read More…
At this present time in the United States, non-religious atheists, agnostics and other non-believers make up over 16 percent of the population, according to Pew Research Center data. This is to say that currently in America, the fourth largest religious tradition is not to adhere to any religious beliefs at Read More…
Thanksgiving is upon us once again, and indeed that fact alone is something to be thankful for. I certainly do not have to remind anyone of the gastronomical considerations — but because the holiday is centered on the enjoyment of the mass consumption of delicious food, our first reaction is Read More…
The day started out just as any other day — breakfast, a quick glance at my readings and one final scan of my organizer — but the choppers I could hear thudding overhead told me this day would be anything but normal. Sure enough, on that Wednesday morning of Nov. Read More…
Stop the violence. It is time once and for all to put an end to student brutality on the campus of UC Berkeley. In the wake of violent student action against UCPD and Alameda County Sheriff’s Office deputies last Wednesday, we are once again reminded of the dangerous menace the Read More…
Hello, beautiful Berkeley. Because of the swell of interest in my recent column promoting the bulk dispersal of our overachieving genes, I thought it would be a good idea to help get the balls rolling, as they say. I initiated the process and have done some of the work (but Read More…
Anyone who has read much of this column is no stranger to the constructive personal mantras I try to promote each week, including so far, self realization, personal enlightenment and, of course, beauty tips. But today I want to expand from a personal focus to include our whole community — Read More…
I managed to track down León Ritz-Barr, who has been occupying Oakland for the last couple of weeks. At least that is what he claims — I was unsure because he does not appear to be a delinquent, homeless anarchist — the type I have been led to believe the movement is Read More…
Believe it or not, despite our economy’s generally decrepit health, some business sectors are doing well. Gold mining is thriving, and of course the banking and financial sector remains strong. Big banks have performed especially well, raking in record profits since the TARP intervention in 2008. And that is pleasing, Read More…