The SQUELCH! party announced its candidates Sunday for the upcoming 2012 ASUC general election, running a full satirical executive slate.
The party traditionally runs a series of joke executive candidates and one serious candidate for the ASUC Senate. The party has won one senate seat consecutively each year for at least six years.
Rachel Horning, a former SQUELCH! senator who will graduate this semester, is the party’s presidential candidate. Junior student Woodrow Currie and current SQUELCH! Senator Noah Ickowitz are running for academic affairs vice president and student advocate, respectively.
The party is also running junior Graham Riley and editor in chief of the Heuristic Squelch Erik Krasner-Karpen for executive vice president and external affairs vice president, but party members did not remember who will run for which position. SQUELCH! is not officially associated with the Heuristic Squelch magazine, though the two have overlapping members and ideas.
As president, Horning said she would have spell-checked emails more thoroughly and held more dance parties in Eshleman Hall than current ASUC President Vishalli Loomba. Horning said her platform involves support for Oski and beer.
“I don’t need rules telling me when and where to drink,” Horning said. “I just drink.”
In a counter-platform, Ickowitz supports prohibition, among other goals.
“I have a late birthday, so I (want) prohibition until I’m 21, so I don’t feel like I’m missing out,” Ickowitz said.
Ickowitz said his opponents for student advocate were “pretty average” but that he is “excited to let people know how excited I am for going abroad next year and not being student advocate.”
But Horning and Ickowitz also struck a more serious note. Horning supports voting in the 2012 state and national elections for increased revenue for higher education, and both cited concerns they had with ASUC leaders’ decisions this year.
Ickowitz was the only senate member to vote against a senate bill to place a referendum on the election ballot to extend the bus pass on campus. Horning said she would have tried to ensure that the ASUC received the best possible deal with AC Transit for student bus passes before placing the referendum on the ballot.
Ickowitz also said he would support selling the Cal Lodge and buying a less expensive retreat cabin.
Horning and Ickowitz will pass down their ideas to Jason Bellet, director of the 2012 ASUC Perspectives Showcase, who is making a serious bid for senate with the SQUELCH! party. Bellet is one of many candidates running for senate with SQUELCH!, though he is the only nonsatirical one.
The election will be held April 10, 11 and 12.