It seems like all we did in high school was fantasize about what college would be like, using trustworthy sources such as TV shows and movies. But now that we are here, it’s easy to see how different it actually is. We at the Clog are here to take you down memory lane and decode some of those college tropes.
“Buffy the Vampire Slayer”
“Buffy the Vampire Slayer” deluded us into thinking high school friends could all end up at the same college and still be biffles. Chances are, if you room with your high school bestie, you will have plenty of horrible college memories to ruin those good ol’ days.
Let’s be real: We all want to have Jeff’s body and ability to do cool parkour tricks during paintball — but chances are, if we held a paintball war with the whole school, we would not have enough room to hold the 36,000 students that go here, and people would still try to study for their finals in the middle of it all. And who can blame them?
Unfortunately, we can’t major in woodworking like Daryl, even though we really want to. Guess we’ll have to settle for Haas.
“The Social Network”
After watching “The Social Network,” you might be attempting to befriend all computer science majors in the hopes that you will run into the next Mark Zuckerberg. You might not have been successful yet and are still holding out on the hope that Cal’s next billionaire will be spotted in Soda.
When we were little, we thought college would be a fun little town with mopeds and scooters. It would be just like Pacific Coast Academy, where every dorm room had a fridge and a TV, and you’d have crazy roommates like Chase or Quinn that you would then learn to love — or they would just disappear, and new roommates could be written in. But so far, we’ve had to deal with trying to heat up the same gross dining hall food. Most students don’t have a TV — or even floor space — and the number of people spending time on mopeds is minimal. We wish we had all the amenities Zoey had.
While drama on campus is unavoidable, this show malicious representation of Greek life is inaccurate — thankfully.
Veronica didn’t enter college until the third season, but we quickly learned that Hearst College wasn’t like our school. We wish we could solve crimes for some extra cash and kick some ass in the meantime. At least Veronica and UC Berkeley students have one experience in common: that of failing tests.
Sometimes we try bursting into song on Sproul. No one else joins.
Contact Ilaf Esuf at [email protected]