44 awkward things that have happened to you at the RSF

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When it comes to awkward moments, no place on campus breeds embarrassment quite like the RSF. From the cumbersome weight-lifting machines to the Caltopia workout attire to odd policies regarding bags — hitting the gym is a surefire way to compromise that suave facade you’ve got going on. You may leave with your dignity crushed — but at least your ass is tighter. Here’s a list of awkward things that have definitely happened to you at the RSF.

1) Jamming your hips into the turnstile and being forced to stay in that position until it moves

2) Being told you can’t bring a bag into the RSF. And playing dumb because maybe, just maybe, they’ll let you off the hook this time

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3) Accidentally staring at a naked person in the locker room because they’re naked

4) Trying to shove your entire backpack into a teensie tiny locker

5) Trying to shove your entire ass into teensie tiny shorts

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6) Tailing someone just a little too close as you walk down the long hall from the locker rooms

7) Fumbling to whip out your Cal 1 Card, only to remember that you left it in your backpack

8) Spending the first 15 minutes of your workout deciding where to workout

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9) Stampeding to the elliptical signup sheet during the 5 p.m. rush

10) Parading around the weight rooms, occasionally sitting on a bench, but never actually lifting weights

11) Being asked to leave the bench because someone actually does want to lift weights

12) Giving people filling up their water bottles the stink eye because they’re taking so long 

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13)  Giving other people the stink eye while you fill up your own water bottle 

14) Taking a zumba class

15) Taking a spin class

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16) Taking any class

17) Sweating profusely

18) Farting

19) Watching the same mtvU music videos over and over again without sound 

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20) Attempting to use the Precor AMT machine because you want to run in slow motion — and almost falling to your death

21) Pancaking on a yoga mat

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22) Tripping on a treadmill

23) Accidentally ripping your earbuds from your iPod during the climax of your cardio session

24) Falling in love with all the really old people at the RSF —  especially that one guy who tucks his ID into his ’80s-style sweatband 

25) Not knowing where to stretch

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26) Stretching everywhere

27) Running into your ex

28) Pretending not to have seen your ex

29) Noticing that one girl who is literally always at the RSF

30) Jamming out to One Direction. There, we said it. 

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31) Trying to leave yoga after 30 minutes

32) Fighting for a basketball court

33) Answering emails while doing sit-ups

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34) Sustaining eye contact with one of the staff members for too long

35) Being asked to finish your elliptical session

36) Sliding around on the slidy, triangle seats

37) Failing to charge your phone at the human-powered charge station

38) Deciding to leave without having actually worked out

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39) Feeling like a bad ass mofo as you pull the exit door the wrong way to re-enter the locker rooms. #rebelwithoutacause

40) Taking too long to decide what to buy from the Pro Shop

41) Having great conversations with the cashier at the Pro Shop

42) Lingering over your food as you watch the men’s water polo team practice in the pool

43) Yanking out your wedgie

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44) Strutting out of the gym like a superstar and savoring the moment, because you know you won’t be back in there for at least a week. 

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Contact Daniela Grinblatt at [email protected].