The semester has officially begun, and like any college students, UC Berkeley kids are realizing how hard they have it going to one of the nation’s top universities — just kidding — but actually, UC Berkeley is the top public university. What exactly are they complaining about?
1. How cold it is outside
Every morning and every night, the weather gets ridiciculously cold, and no one knows how to dress for it.
2. How hot it is outside
Then, in the middle of the day, it gets nice — maybe a little too nice.
3. How they caught a cold last week
Germs are being shared all around, and Emergen-C can’t protect them once they’re already sick. Time for NyQuil!
4. How they haven’t been going to the gym but are still walking everywhere
Yes, Berkeley has hills — and homework — both of which mean they at least get a workout somehow.
5. How much money they’re spending
Already sick of going to the dining halls or cooking for themselves, they’re going out at least once a day, and no meal costs fewer than $5.
6. How they didn’t get tickets to Mad Decent
Tickets were too expensive.
7. How soon their midterms are coming up
“What kind of professor has a midterm two weeks into class?” they shout at anyone who will listen sympathetically or not.
Contact Holly Secon at [email protected].