7 suggestions for where to eat based on what you’re feeling

We may not care to admit that a bitter cup of piping hot, fair-trade coffee is just so much better alongside a musty old novel and gloomy thunderstorms and when we are clad in our finest flannel — yet it is. Or maybe our real guilty pleasure was the Chipotle Quesarito we ate when we got our first paper of the semester back. Whether our mood calls for scampering to the nearest farmer’s market before a night of golden-hour hikes and a folksy jam session or darting through the listless crowds on Telegraph Avenue to grab a greasy Top Dog in hopes of quelling our Chemistry 1A-fueled rage before the midterm, it is safe to say that emotions greatly affect what we choose to eat.

Attempting to ease such a culinary quest, we have compiled a list of the restaurants we feel best embody what our bodies need for any given mood we may be in:

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Emotion: Wanderlust

Restaurant: International House Cafe

Maybe it’s all of the international students. Maybe it isn’t. Maybe it’s something flowing through the rusty, old water pipes of the International House plumbing. Maybe it’s the coffee. Whatever it is, the aura of cool we feel walking up the International House Cafe’s ridiculously long ramp to buy a cappuccino never fails to make us feel as though we are traipsing around the Eiffel Tower, paddling through the canals in Venice and treating ourselves to a pint in Ireland … all at the same time!

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Emotion: Angry

Restaurant: Top Dog

On second thought, we should probably all stay away from Top Dog when we are angry, miffed or even slightly put-out. They’ve got enough rage bubbling in those sausage pots for the whole of Berkeley.

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Emotion: Energetic

Restaurant: Anywhere in the North Asian Ghetto

Despite the convenience of rolling out of our unit and right onto Telegraph Avenue, we occasionally have enough steam to make it all the way across campus to less busy Northside. Besides, sometimes the hustle and bustle of the Berkeley-est region of Berkeley can be a bit too day-in and day-out, so when you’re fed up with Southside, head to a little home away from Telegraph. Good news: the North Asian Ghetto is basically the Asian Ghetto … only north … and clean.

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Emotion: Stressed

Restaurant: Yogurt Park

When our mental health starts to go south and we can’t stand the thought of one more meal from Crossroads, we know what we have to do: fro-yo. Now, before you start thinking this is just going to be another ode to yogurt, just you wait, because Yogurt Park has been cooling Berkeley down on hot summer days long before the fro-yo craze hit. Yogurt Park may just be the creme de la creme of fro-yo — no pun intended. Its trademark is thick, creamy, ice cream-style yogurt, generous toppings and an ever-evolving menu of frosty flavors. Not only that, but we seriously doubt any other yogurt shop can boast a 37-year existence. That’s right: Yogurt Park has been churning out classic flavors for quite some time. Diehard foodies aren’t afraid to walk right past the crowds of CREAM lovers to opt for a mini Yogurt Park cup with rainbow sprinkles or perhaps Ghirardelli chocolate with nuts.

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Emotion: Guilty

Restaurant: Smart Alec’s

Whether you slept through your indented morning jog — again — or  unintentionally ate the entire box of Oreos in your bed last night while binge watching Parks and Recreation, sometimes we need a little midweek pick me up. Smart Alec’s has our back with their mind-numbingly fabulous cornbread and inspiringly meat-like veggie burgers. It’s perfect for sitting by the window judging others’ similarly imperfect eating habits while haughtily munching on an earthy salad.

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Emotion: Cheerful

Restaurant: CREAM

Aside from the long lines preventing us from reaching our weekly Quidditch meeting in a timely fashion, CREAM wrappers strewn across hell’s half acre and the toll the warm yet icy sandwiches take on our blood sugar, who can really hate CREAM? We know we can’t!

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Emotion: Spiteful

Restaurant: Scoop Dreams

The only thing worse than an ice-cream-sandwich monopoly is the other shop that tries to compete with it. Scoop Dreams — roommates with the more familiar Rasputin Music — plays the latter in this scenario.

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