Which type of Berkeley squirrel are you?

Grace Beaudoin/Courtesy

Berkeley, the land of endless studying, flyers and … squirrels! Yes, as we all know here at UC Berkeley, the squirrels on this campus are a problem. Whether they are jumping on your backpack, chasing each other or eating the food they’ve been fed by members of tour groups, we can all agree that Berkeley squirrels are truly unique. Find out which Berkeley squirrel you would be.

  1. What is your ideal date?
    1. Going to a sporting event
    2. A spa date
    3. Going to Crossroads and eating alone
    4. Going to the city and taking photo booth photos
    5. Exploring the different hiking trails around Berkeley
  2. Your roommate is doing something that bothers you, you …
    1. Yell at them.
    2. Passive aggressively deal with the situation.
    3. Don’t do anything unless it involved them eating your food stash.
    4. Ask them nicely to stop doing whatever is bothering you.
    5. Take some deep breaths and know it’ll eventually work itself out.
  3. It’s Friday night and you are most likely …
    1. Going ham at a party
    2. Getting your hair and nails done
    3. Eating alone and watching Netflix
    4. Going out to dinner with some close friends
    5. Making a home cooked meal and reading a book
  4. You are planning your schedule for next semester and one of your classes has a final Friday from 7–10 p.m. What do you do? 
    1. Take the class and demand that the final be rescheduled.
    2. Choose a different class completely and reconsider your major (there is no way you would ever suffer through a final at that time!).
    3. Take the class and make sure you eat a lot before, during and after the exam.
    4. Find an excuse for why you have to take the final early.
    5. Appreciate that you have extra time to study for the final.
  5. How do you relieve stress?
    1. Go to the gym and box.
    2. Spend time looking nice (doing your hair, makeup, etc.).
    3. Eat.
    4. Go get some “fro-yo” with your friends.
    5. Take a hike and detach from electronics for a bit.
  6. You see a large tour group. Your first reaction is to …
    1. Chase after them.
    2. Run away.
    3. Go see if anyone is eating or dropped food you can have.
    4. Get in people’s photos.
    5. You never see tour groups.
  7. What is your favorite thing about Berkeley?
    1. Walking through Sproul
    2. All the classes you get to choose from
    3. FOOD EVERYWHERE
    4. Game days!
    5. The beautiful weather and hiking trails
    1. evil squirrelAggressive: You are the squirrel that everyone is afraid of. You like to chase other squirrels to show them who is boss. Your normal hangouts are around Dwinelle and it is not uncommon to find you chasing someone into the building.
    2. squirrel_HaydenIrwinFrayed tail: You have been in Berkeley for quite some time and have the wear and tear to prove it. You are a bit calmer and tend to stay out of people’s way. Although often called the uglier squirrel, you know your old age just makes you wiser.
    3. squirrel gifObese: You are the squirrel sitting on a ledge eating. How you get your food varies, but you always have food. You might move a little slower than some of the other squirrels, but you don’t care. Your end goal is to have a satisfying meal and a full stomach.
    4. squirrels“Cute:” Although there really is no such thing as a “cute” squirrel here at UC Berkeley, you come closest. You are the ones the tour groups stop to take pictures of and the fools sitting outside decide to feed.
    5. 10.09.squirrel.FANGNative: You are actually not found in Berkeley. You are a gray squirrel, native to California and would not be caught dead on the UC Berkeley campus. You prefer the nature to city.

Contact Morissa Berman at [email protected].