Which punctuation mark are you?

  1. You see your friend walking across Sproul Plaza. You say:
    1. HEYYY
    2. Sup.
    3. How’s it going?
    4. Nothing.
  2. You stayed up all night studying for your midterm. You went to every study group and only fell asleep in class a couple of times this semester. You open your blue book and select your pen. Then you read the first question, and you have no idea what it’s talking about. You …
    1. Scream. No, run, just run. Keep running and don’t look back.
    2. Take a deep breath and think. You’ve got this.
    3. Are you even in this class?
    4. Skip the question. Skip all the questions.
  3. It’s midnight and you’re still at Main Stacks. Suddenly, your eyes lift up from your textbook/essay/Facebook, and your eyes meet a cute fellow scholar’s across the shelves. You both smile. What do you do next?
    1. You channel your inner Sasha Fierce and make the first bold, seductive move.
    2. You smile and start a conversation like a normal, well-adjusted human.
    3. Is your hair OK? Can they tell you haven’t showered in three days? Wait, when was the last time you showered?
    4. Wait for them to make the first move. Maintain the air of mystery.
  4. You’re at a party with your friends, and you’re tearing it up on the dance floor. All of a sudden, you lose your get-home-safe buddy. You …
    1. Scream their name at the top of your lungs. Though to be honest, this might be why you aren’t invited to many parties.
    2. Freeze. You remember your Disneyland training and stay in one place until you’ve been found.
    3. Oh, my God, where did they go? Why did they abandon me like this? Don’t they know I can’t handle it?
    4. Interrupt the DJ, grab the mic and make an announcement. Then let the party continue.
  5. What are you making for dinner?
    1. You don’t often cook, but when you do, it’s with all the flourish and style of Emeril.
    2. A balanced meal with protein and vegetables.
    3. You have no idea. What’s SpoonRocket offering?
    4. You debate about it for a little bit but just end up snacking on whatever’s in your kitchen.
    1. You’re an exclamation point! You are loud and bold and unafraid to be noticed. Though you don’t always get invited to the party, when you are, you make an unforgettable statement. Let the haters hate — you know you leave a mark.
    2. You’re a period. You are stable, reliable and trustworthy. When in doubt, your friends always turn to you. Even though you aren’t as exciting as some of the other punctuation marks, you know that you’ve got it together and that you’ll always be there when needed — which is all the time.
    3. You’re a question mark? A little confused and often in doubt, you find making decisions extraordinarily difficult and often have memory trouble. Sometimes, you wonder if you even complete a sentence.
    4. You’re the ellipses. Mysterious and aloof, you may or may not be hiding something. Sometimes, you feel like you’re just a pause or an interruption in other people’s lives. Sometimes, you can feel a little obnoxious … like someone typing on iMessage but then NEVER SENDING A MESSAGE.

Patricia Serpa is an assistant night editor. Contact her at [email protected].