Why is the Olympic pool water green?

Michaela Swensen/File

If you’ve been keeping up with the Olympics, you probably have heard about the “green pool syndrome” that has been plaguing the Rio Olympics. We know the press is saying this color is due to either changes in alkalinity or algae blooms, but we at the Clog have some of our own speculations.

1. The Kool-Aid man

It seems quite possible that the Kool-Aid man has snuck into the Olympic stadium late at night when no one was on guard. Our leads suggest he has released Green Apple Kool-Aid into the water. Although this theory seems highly likely, we can’t figure out what his motive would be, therefore it wasn’t taken seriously by the International Olympic Committee.

2. The pebble

As many of us remember from the scene in “Finding Nemo,” the fish easily figured out a way to make their tank water dirty. They put a pebble in the filtration system and the water quickly turned from crystal clear to murky and green. Perhaps Nemo and Gill have been trapped in the pool throughout the length of the games and, in an attempt to escape, they devised a plan to get out of the pool and back into the ocean.

3. Green tea

Remember how the water in the harbor of the Boston tea party turned brown when the patriots threw the British tea overboard? We’re thinking this is what happened at the Olympic Games but with green tea. We don’t really know who would be behind this, but it seems that an anonymous prankster could have poured several hundred bags of green tea into the pools as no one was looking — perhaps because of the health benefits this tea provides. Who knows?

4. Ryan Lochte’s hair

We’re thinking some of the blue dye in Lochte’s hair has come out and changed the color of the entire pool. Highly unlikely, but still possible.

5. Naked Juice

Maybe Naked Juice replaced all the water with their famous Green Machine juice just for some advertising publicity. In order to get the athletes sufficiently addicted to their product, studies told them that seeping it into their skin would show fastest results.

6. The common cold

This hypothesis is quite disturbing, but is it possible that several of the athletes have a cold and their boogers have somewhat infused with the pool water turning it a magnificent green? Unlikely, but worth some consideration.

7. Toxic waste

Perhaps Springfield has run out of space for all of its toxic waste and has had to start shipping it abroad. We blame Homer Simpson for this green, murky liquid.

8. The sky is green

Perhaps the ceiling of the Olympic stadium is green and the color of the pool is just a reflection. Sometimes the most obvious reason is the answer.

Ok, you caught us, obviously we know these aren’t the reasons the pools have turned green but it is funny to imagine.

Contact Allison David at [email protected].