The eternal struggle to eat a vegetable combined with this cold weather has us all on the brink of influenza. If you’re anything like the rest of the student body, you’re probably a week away from contracting scurvy and the common cold. And while being sick sucks, being alone sucks even more. Luckily, we at the Clog have compiled some useful pick up lines to use when your immune system bites the dust. Hopefully these snappy remarks will help you find a snuggle buddy during those sniffly times. Keep in mind that there’s a fine line between pick up lines about being sick, and pick up lines that are sick — so tread lightly.

1. You don’t need to go to the Tang Center. I can give you a physical exam right here.
2. Do you have a cold? ‘Cause you’re giving me the chills.
3. I think you’re suffering from a lack of Vitamin ME.
4. May I take your temperature? You’re looking pretty hot.
5. My stomach has been aching. Are you my appendix? ‘Cause I have a feeling I should take you out.
6. You’re hotter than my fever.
7. According to Web MD, the best way to cure cold symptoms is to kiss someone cute. Can’t argue with medicine.
8. My muscle aches are nothing compared to the heartache you’re causing me.
9. My nose has been running for days, but you’ve been running through my mind for weeks.
10. I’m actually a new medicine for the common cold. Doctors advise that you apply me to sensitive areas.
11. I’d like to get you into bed before the flu does.
12. We should probably study each other’s anatomy to find a cure.
13. You should get some rest. We can hiber-mate together.

At least with these pick up lines, you can find love even if you can’t find a cure for your cold.