Quiz: What should you order at Taco Bell?

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It’s finally here! No, not A/C in the dorms, or a functional CalCentral site — it’s the new Taco Bell Cantina! We at the Clog know that the vast menu can sometimes be overwhelming, so we’ve created this helpful quiz to help you narrow it down. Live mas, Bears!

  1. What music are you currently obsessed with?
    1. “Closer” by The Chainsmokers featuring Halsey. What can I say? I miss game day.
    2. It’s like, halfway between R&B and ska, with a dash of country and some definite electronic influences. I’ll send you a link to their Soundcloud — you wouldn’t have heard of them.
    3. The “Hamilton” soundtrack, on repeat. I’m trying to memorize it to make up for the fact I couldn’t get tickets.
    4. I don’t listen to music, but I found a great new podcast last week about earthquakes that is just fascinating!
  2. Which campus building looks the most like you?
    1. Pimentel Hall. I’m definitely a little rounder after winter break.
    2. Evans Hall. It’s what’s inside that counts, after all.
    3. Doe Library. I keep it classy and favor vintage styles over the latest trends.
    4. Wurster Hall. I always make an impression.
  3. Why do you want Taco Bell?
    1. I’m a freshman still rebelling against my parents by eating whatever the hell I want.
    2. It’s 1:30 a.m. and Taco Bell is the only thing that’s open.
    3. I am drunk and/or high. Those are the only reasons anyone would ever crave Taco Bell.
    4. I don’t. My friend from the Midwest dragged me here because he wanted “real Mexican food.”
  4. How much time are you willing to spend in the bathroom after this?
    1. I have class in 20 minutes, so as little time as humanly possible.
    2. I’d prefer multiple, shorter trips over one long visit.
    3. It’s Friday night and I just left the frats, so I have all the time in the world!
    4. Approximately one hour. I scheduled time in bCal for this, so I should be good.
  5. What’s your major?
    1. Art History
    2. EECS
    3. Political Science
    4. Applied Math
    1. Three traditional crunchy tacos. You know exactly what you want and you aren’t afraid to ask for it. Life is short, so why waste time on something you aren’t sure you’ll like? Keep it simple with the same order your picky little sister gets every time (lettuce optional).
    2. A Baja Blast. You’re cool. Really cool. Like, really really cool. So cool, in fact, that a Baja Blast is literally the only way for you to cool down anymore. The icy texture, the blue-green hue and the sweet flavor make this drink the perfect choice for anyone who is unquestionably cool, like you are.
    3. Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Tacos. You’re a wild card and down for anything. When met with a challenge, you don’t falter. Instead, you step up and find the wildest, most unexpected solution — but it always works, just like these tacos.
    4. Nachos. You’re a people-pleaser. Comfortable with crowds and groups, you always wind up in the center of it all. You have a little something for everyone, and that’s why people like you. Follow your nature and pick up a plate of nachos for your group.

Contact Jamie Campbell at [email protected].