After recently publishing a post on the different types of GSIs at UC Berkeley, we at the Clog decided to do a follow-up post on the different types of students in your discussion section. Each section is like a lottery; you might end up with five of your friends, or you might end up with the kid who has to open the loudest bag of chips every section and the person who always comes late but chooses to push their way to the back of the classroom anyway.
1. The person who only talks when the GSI comes around to listen to your small group
The most bittersweet moment during section is when the GSI says, “Split up into small groups now,” because you don’t have to participate in the large discussion, but you also have to get up out of your chair to go find your group. But there’s always that one person that only starts speaking in the small group when the GSI comes around to listen to what your group is saying. Then, all of a sudden, it’s like that one student has memorized the reading and is trying to reach a world record of reciting the reading word for word.
2. The person who forgot the reader
Whenever you split up into small groups or have to do an assignment that goes along with the reading, you can see out of your peripheral vision the one student who’s always anxiously looking around and trying to decide who to ask to borrow their reader. You desperately avoid eye contact until they finally decide to ask someone else. Unless you’re a good person, that is.
3. The teacher’s pet
This is the type of person who gets to section 14 minutes early, actually completes that week’s assignment, has eternally clean shoes and flosses three times a day. They probably also match with the GSI on both Tinder and LinkedIn and have already emailed them saying they are very interested in their dissertation work.
4. The breadth taker
This student is clearly only taking this class to fulfill some general requirement for their major. They look annoyed 102 percent of the time, and whenever someone speaks in section, they look around confused, as if thinking, “Does anyone else know what the actual fuck we’re talking about?” They also check the time every minute for the entire 59-minute class.
5. The ancient one
There’s always that one 40 year old that has decided to go back to school and confuses the hell out of everyone at the very first section because they leave everyone wondering why the GSI is sitting at the back of the classroom like a mere mortal.
6. The loud one
This person is usually just the worst type of person, failing to leave a single thought inside of their mind even if it doesn’t relate to what the GSI is talking about at all. The class could be focused on ancient ruins around the world and this person would bring up that one time their little brother sprained their foot while on a trip to Egypt in 2007.
So whether you’re the person who always asks to borrow a charger in section or the one who never speaks, here’s to hoping you actually know what’s going on in section for once.
Contact Emilia Malachowski at [email protected].