Ron Swanson once said, “There has never been a sadness that can’t be cured by breakfast food.” Lucky for us, he’s right.
We love you, breakfast. From bacon to biscuits and every Benedict in between, you’ve been there for us in good times and bad. When we pull an all-nighter before our 8 a.m. midterm, your heavenly waffle gives us the strength to take our exam. When we go a little too hard on a Friday night, your hash browns are the only saving grace that can get us through the morning after.
Beyond just plucking us from despair, you’ve been a constant in good times as well. We’re no stranger to the celebratory brunch after finishing finals or finding a job.
We know that we occasionally forget to honor you as we should. We’re sorry to say that the wonders that you bring to the table (no pun intended) often get lost in the hustle. As starving college students with abhorrent sleep schedules, our first meal of the day often occurs about 2 p.m. At times your sacredness gets lost in our fourth cup of Top Ramen as we cram for our third midterm in two weeks. Regardless, there’s no excuse for our neglect of all that you offer. After all, we’ve never met a waffle we didn’t like, or a pancake we didn’t agree with.
It’s high time we shed light on how truly wondrous you are.
Your diversity knows no bounds. From huevos rancheros to savory crepes, you bring cultures and cuisines together into one menu of love. The way French toast and breakfast burritos can so casually share a single diner countertop provides inclusivity that we should mirror in our day-to-day life.
Thank you for showing us who our real friends are. Any heathen who orders a lunch item when the breakfast menu is still up for grabs doesn’t deserve our time of day. We don’t need that kind of negativity in our lives.
Your tearing down of barriers inspires us to test society’s limits. Anyone who has ever enjoyed a midnight bowl of cereal would agree that there’s never a wrong time to enjoy supposed “morning cuisine.” Similarly, the wonder of the breakfast sandwich, that melds lunch and breakfast so effortlessly, brings tears to our eyes.
You’ll always be our day one. Our ride or die.
We want to let you know that we love you from the bottom of our hearts and stomachs.
Long live breakfast.
Peace, love, and Clog.