Clog report: Mass shortage of flyers after too much interest in clubs

Nikhar Arora/File

In a strange turn of events, flyering has picked up speed on campus, causing a mass shortage of flyers.

The trouble began last week, when a confident student walked up to a club representative on Sproul and took a flyer. There was no offer. There was no resistance. The passerby initiated contact and willingly received the piece of paper. Fellow students took notice and began to do the same. Shouts could be heard everywhere containing comments like “Wow! I am interested in joining a business frat!” and “Golly! There is some useful information on this form!”

It wasn’t long until madness ensued. Students quickly turned from innocent bystanders into angry rioters demanding more flyers. Representatives from respective clubs began to panic as their supply of flyers diminished rapidly. It wasn’t long until they would have nothing but their knowledge to share with the ravenous students.

Some quick thinking led one club leader to request that students take pictures of their last remaining flyers. While the students were not pleased, it seemed to calm them enough to keep tables from being upturned. When we spoke with the club leader, she informed the Clog that she had “never seen anything like it.”

As the Campanile bell tolled, students began to disperse, and Upper Sproul calmed down. Little did the tablers know, however, that this was just the beginning. In the following days, info sessions were overrun with protesters demanding to be informed of club information. Unfortunately, but quite unsurprisingly, the rooms were too small to fit all the attendees. The hallways were thus filled with students saying the flyers were not enough. They wanted info sessions and they wanted them right then.

After some brainstorming, club leaders decided to do live broadcasts of their info sessions on Facebook. The crisis was averted. Still, the whole experience left everyone involved wondering what will happen in future flyering events. Will clubs come prepared? Or will their tables be destroyed and their clubs overrun with enraged flyerless individuals? Only time will tell.

Contact Hailey Johnson at [email protected].