While some people are struggling to ration their meal points for the last two weeks of school, others are struggling to spend all their meal points — we know, what a first world problem. We can’t wrap our minds around the fact that students have not been spending their points on Berkeley’s most luxurious dining halls and markets. How can this be? As always, the Clog is here to solve your problems once again — we’re not getting paid enough for this. Here are ways you can splurge with your meal points before the school year ends.
Buy a bunch of yerba mate
Red Bull? Tea? Coffee? Lame! Yerba mate is the new source of energy for UC Berkeley students. Use your points and buy literally all the yerba mate you can. You can chug them all week to make sure you are energized and ready to take finals!
Tuition costs are rising. Make some extra cash by selling your meal points on sites such as Free and For Sale. But you might not get too much interest, as it’s sort of late in the game. We recommend lowering the cost of your meal points to a quarter to beat your competitors.
Prepare for Thanksgiving
Although Thanksgiving is six months away, it’s never too early to start preparing for your Thanksgiving meal. Beat the long, chaotic lines the day before Thanksgiving and start shopping now! Bear Market, the Golden Bear café, and the Den have an array of options you can choose from. Some might even say these markets are better than Safeway.
Go on dates
If they swipe right, swipe them in. As mentioned earlier, Berkeley’s dining halls are known as some of the best restaurants in Berkeley. Impress your dates by treating them to a five-course meal at the lavish Crossroads. We promise they won’t stop blowing up your phone after.
Try to use them somewhere else
Go around Berkeley and ask restaurants if they accept meal points. Most likely the answer will be no, but it doesn’t hurt to try.
There are plenty of people who don’t have enough meal points to survive these last few days. Find them and take advantage of them. Bribe them with meal points to do tasks for you, such as doing your laundry, organizing your dorm or life, taking your finals or finding more people deprived of meal points.
If you’re really desperate to use all your meal points, pay people to take them from you. Stand in front of any dining hall or market with a sign reading, “Will pay you to use my meal points,” and we promise you’ll be out of meal points and money by the end of the day.
Good luck, Golden Bears. We hope you’ll be out of meal points soon.