What ‘The Bachelorette’ contestants would major in at UC Berkeley

With May comes a new season of “The Bachelorette”! It seems like everyone in Bachelor Nation is excited to watch Becca Kufrin as this year’s lead, especially after being proposed to and then dumped by the most recent bachelor, Arie Luyendyk Jr.

With her catchy tagline of “Let’s do the damn thing,” Becca started her season at the iconic Bachelor Mansion by meeting both awfully amazing and amazingly awful men.

Even though the season is only one episode in, loud, romantic and awkward personalities are already very visible. Here’s a breakdown of some of our favorite (and least favorite) “Bachelorette” contestants and what their majors would be if they attended UC Berkeley.

Jean Blanc

Although his introduction got off to a strange start by featuring the copious amount of cologne he collects, Jean Blanc quickly warmed Becca’s and our own hearts with his poise and eloquence. Out of the limo, he taught Becca how to say “Let’s do the damn thing” in French and later that night read a short poem for her. This Haiti native is clearly a great fit for the rhetoric major; we can only imagine what else he would write after a class or two.

Trent

When Trent pulled up to meet Becca, he didn’t exactly follow the limousine protocol. Instead, to the surprise of the bachelorette and other contestants, he showed up in a hearse. For those of you who are unsure what a hearse is, it’s the car that carries coffins for a funeral — a little weird, right? Trent followed up his entrance with a pun about how he “literally died” when he found out Becca was the bachelorette — his dramatics made it clear which major he would declare: theater and performance studies.

Chris

From the beginning, Chris brought out the big guns in the hopes of wooing Becca. His limo entrance was accompanied by a full gospel choir, which quickly won Becca over. Later in the night, though, he called out another contestant, Chase, revealing that he had received damaging texts about Chase from one of his ex-girlfriends. The short-lived fiasco resulted in Chase being sent home. It’s safe to say that Chris’ tactics worked. His snake-like behavior is indicative of that of a Haas student.

John

The software engineer wasn’t featured much in the episode, but his occupation isn’t the only reason he would be an EECS major if he attended UC Berkeley. The little bit of his interaction with Becca that was featured was, well, pretty awkward. If stereotypes are true, John’s personality matches that of the average EECS student. Maybe he’ll come out of his shell later, just like we keep convincing ourselves that maybe one day our EECS friends will shower regularly.

Jordan

Our minds were blown by Jordan’s personality — and not in a good way. He frequently talked down to other contestants, made grand analogies that didn’t really make sense and claimed that he spent six hours picking his outfit. Although his commentary was laughable, we can’t help but feel that his arrogance is going to get annoying really fast. Similar to loudmouth political science majors, we just want Jordan to tone it down and learn how to be a normal human.

While first impressions aren’t everything, they do dictate a lot of the decisions made on “The Bachelorette.” As the season unfolds, we are sure to see some more Haasholes come out of the woodwork, but we hope Becca finds a great man to spend her life with it’s a pretty major decision.

Contact Erin Haar at [email protected].