Bizarre meals that we’ve eaten as college students

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A common struggle upon coming into college is how to live a functional and healthy life. The struggle to keep a balanced, nutritious diet is particularly difficult. That sudden additional responsibility to feed yourself, which many college students haven’t had to deal with before, results in various overcorrections of over- or under-eating. Not to mention how stress, forgetfulness or just sheer lack of time can also mess with our eating schedules. Here are some of the weird meals we at the Clog have eaten during our college careers!

Just boba

Get into the Berkeley spirit and literally live off of boba! Those tapioca balls are surprisingly filling. Bonus points if you were planning on eating a real meal after but decided that you were too full after finishing your sugary beverage.

Smoothies

Smoothies are healthy, right? People have smoothies for breakfast all the time. Can’t you just have one for every meal? And like boba, the semi-solid drink (see also: meal) of a smoothie is half the price of getting takeout. Bonus points if you adopt this cost-effective meal plan during the winter.

Cereal for all three meals

Breakfast is many people’s favorite meal, but actually frying the bacon and scrambling the eggs and making the pancakes is honestly a lot of work. Pour yourself a bowl of cereal and have the best meal of the day over and over again! Bonus points if you don’t add milk.

A whole pack of Oreos

There’s a certain guilty pleasure in stuffing all that sugary goodness down your gullet, knowing that there is no universe in which this is even remotely acceptable. Once you’re already halfway through the pack, there’s no turning back. Bonus points if you eat these cookies while you’re stress eating. 

Cheese

A. Whole. Block. Of. Cheese. We’ll admit — this was not our finest moment.

Fruits from the dining halls

After a week of stocking up by collecting one (or four) pieces of fruit every time you go to the dining hall, you reach the point when you might as well just consume it all in one sitting. You eat six bananas, two oranges, three apples and that random brownie for dessert. It’s a feast fit for a king. Bonus points for all that fiber.

More boba

Because why not?

Rice paper with deli meat and ketchup

Sometimes you have to scrounge together whatever leftovers you have in the fridge and mush them together into one fancy entree. Who cares if they actually go together. In your defense, ketchup goes with everything. Bonus points if you can pass it off as a fusion cuisine dish so your roommates don’t judge you.

Free pizza at info sessions

UC Berkeley life hacks: Figure out which campus organizations offer free food, then channel your inner snake and go network for your dinner. Bonus points if you stay late and manage to take home any of the extra boxes.

In all seriousness, do take the time out of your schedule to eat two or three balanced, healthy meals a day. This is a collection of our experiences, not a bucket list. Don’t do it. Please.

Contact Jonathan Lai at [email protected].