Simply owning a pet is already hard. But, owning a pet as a college student is brutal. You’ll have to wake up at 5 a.m. on the dot every day, feed your pet, clean up its poop and make sure it’s well cared for as you head out for the day. Drunken nights when you stumble in at the haunting hour of 3 a.m. are no longer allowed, or else you may come back home to a very judgmental hamster glaring at you. We at the Clog know, however, that some college students can’t bear to live another day without a domesticated companion. If you think you can handle it, read on to see if you fit the qualifications!
Do you come home every day after a long day of classes, clubs and a startling lack of social interaction and cry into your pillow without fail? You could probably use a pet. We recommend a cat or a dog — something you can cuddle with and unleash all your bottled up and unused love and affection on.
You have an immense amount of free time
If you’re one of those strange UC Berkeley students who has an unsettling amount of free time on their hands, adopt a pet! They obviously will drain all of your time and force you to never leave your house ever again, but with all the ~free time~ you have, you won’t ever have to! Classes? Dropped. Job? Quit (or more realistically, fired). Friends and family? Ghosted. It’s only you and your pet now. Forever.
Your housing allows pets
Just because you can, definitely means you should. Take advantage of the fact that your saint of a landlord allows pets in your apartment or house! Seriously, this is probably the only time you can take advantage of them. You can stockpile pets like there’s no tomorrow. Clear out the shelters like it’s Aug. 17! Twenty-five cats, 30 iguanas and 15 hedgehogs should do the trick.
It’s always been your childhood dream to be one with animals
Don’t let your dreams be dreams — adopt a pet already. Channel your inner Crocodile Dundee or future crazy cat person-self so you can have a wild but loyal being at your side. We know you used to write letters to Santa about wanting a pet wrapped up with a bow on it under your tree.
Don’t limit yourself to just cats and dogs, either! Let one of the amazing animal shelters or humane societies (and, OK, PetSmart) be your oyster. and adopt a bunny, a lizard, a ferret, a guinea pig, an actual pig or, for the brave, fish.
Contact Pooja Bale at [email protected].