The many libraries of UC Berkeley draw students from far and wide. We must ask ourselves, however, what is the proper etiquette for eating in a library? Is it acceptable to eat your loaded Doritos Locos taco from Taco Bell on Durant in the hallowed silence of Moffit? A reddit user specified, “I’m not talking about snacks or a salad or like a pb&j; I mean a huge ass smelly ass carne asada burrito or a dirty ass plate of chipotle.” Join us on our journey in exploring the sanctity of having a meal in a library.
The obvious answer to whether or not it’s inappropriate to have a meal in a library is that it undoubtedly is. Before you rage on us, hear us out. Eating in a library is recipe for disaster. There are too many things that can go wrong, too many inconsiderate people and frankly, it’s unsanitary.
First and foremost, accidents happen. If you’re munching on a greasy burger from Super Duper and you drop it on the book you’ve searched long and hard for in Main Stacks, there’s no salvaging it — the burger, that is. It’ll be reduced to a sad, oily mess forever. And, you’ll probably have to pay to replace the book. No, not even your Dyson Supersonic hair dryer which you keep in your satchel for styling emergencies can help you here.
Secondly, libraries are nasty. Students sit there festering for hours at a time, sweating nervously over their next midterms and clacking away at computers they haven’t wiped down in forever. Is that really an environment you want to eat your food in? The stale air that’s trapped in Moffit will contaminate the ramen-to-go you got from your favorite ramen place, and all you’ll be able to taste is Jane from math’s set of crusty notebooks. The five-second rule definitely doesn’t apply in any library, no ma’am.
We know students value their privacy and right to be secure in themselves. What if you’re enjoying your soup in Doe, minding your own damn business, and someone comes up to you and asks in a booming voice if they can have a bite of your soup? You know that’ll echo, and soon, everyone will be hovering over you and your soup. You’ll either have to ration it out drop by drop to an endless tail of students or fend them off like wild dogs. It’s a lose-lose situation.
Libraries are free-for-alls. No one is safe. It’s a smart survivalist method to eat your food outside in seclusion. Yes, we know you technically can’t eat in any library but Moffit, but would you still really want to eat in any library at all? We hope the answer is no.
Contact Pooja Bale at [email protected] .