15 useful excuses for not studying during dead week

A squirrel eating someone's math notes
Nishali Naik/Staff

Happy dead week, Cloggers! As final exams and deadlines rapidly approach, you may be thinking that now is the time to hunker down and start studying. But if you’re like many of us here at the Clog, you may also be finding yourself lacking the motivation to open the study guide or crank out that final research paper. If you feel like pushing off studying until the Sunday before finals, we’ve got some great excuses prepared for you so that you can explain to your parents, professors and anyone with a vested interest in your GPA why it may have taken a turn this finals week.

  1. AirBears2 was down.
  2. You ran into Oski on campus, and it scared you so much you passed out.
  3. There were no seats in Moffitt Library.
  4. You had to catch up on “Game of Thrones.”
  5. A squirrel ate all of your lecture notes.
  6. You fell asleep in Main Stacks because you weren’t allowed to bring coffee in.
  7. A Nixle alert said there was an armed robbery near your apartment, so you couldn’t go to the library.
  8. You were trying to be eco-friendly by not using energy to charge your laptop.
  9. A Kiwibot ran you over.
  10. NextBus was down, so you didn’t know what time to catch the 51B to go to campus.
  11. You got lost in Dwinelle on the way to the review session.
  12. You were knocked over by a participant in the Naked Run.
  13. You got hit by a protest sign.
  14. Your study buddy was snapped away by Thanos.
  15. All the stores on and around campus ran out of Red Bull.

If anyone asks why you were lounging on the Glade instead of hitting the books in the library, feel free to pull out any of these excuses to justify your laziness. Good luck (not) studying, Bears!

Contact Hannah Nguyen at [email protected].