Reasons you should be worried about the moth outbreak

Illustration of person running from moths
Armaan Mumtaz/Staff

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“It’s raining caterpillars!” was a common thought in my head as I walked around campus during the first few days of school. A ten-minute walk would end with you arriving at your class with caterpillars in your hair, on your clothes and coming out of your backpack. Luckily for us, we no longer have to worry about this annoying problem — these caterpillars have gone through metamorphosis and are now moths! As we all know, moths are one of the most annoying creatures to grace this earth. So instead of worrying about having a caterpillar in your hair every once in a while, we can now focus our attention on much bigger things. Here are a few situations to avoid with moths and why.

A moth lands on you

If a moth lands on you, you’ll have bad luck for the next two hours. That midterm you’re on your way to take? Yeahhh, better luck next time. That bus you were about to catch? Today’s not the day. Look — it’s leaving already! That job application you were about to submit? The position has already been filled. To avoid an outcome like this, the best thing to do if you see a moth is to run around screaming as loudly as you possibly can and flail your arms and legs. Don’t worry, no one will look at you like you’re crazy and you’ll avoid a stroke of bad luck!

A moth flies into your face

If you see a moth flying toward your face, you should probably duck and cover as fast as possible if you don’t want to be hit by a moving vehicle in the next 24 hours. That’s right, a moth flying into your face is a precursor to something much larger coming at you, whether that be a Boosted Board, a bike or a bus.

You’re within one mile of a moth

If you’re within a one mile radius of a moth, it’s a sign you should just drop out of school right this second. Nothing good will come out of it. The only way to prevent this from being your only option is to invest in a beekeeper suit and wear it at all times. This way, the moths can have no effect on you whatsoever.

Now you see why the moth outbreak on campus should be your greatest concern right now (but really these are only superstitions, of course). We at the Clog recommend that you forget about power outages and midterms, and focus all your attention on protecting yourself from the moths.

Contact Beatrice Aronson at [email protected].