Lately, the weather in Berkeley has started to cool down and become that hazy, overcast weather we all love so much. While San Francisco can often be seen shrouded in thick, cold fog, the Berkeley equivalent is a thin, chilly mist. Just as San Francisco’s fog has earned the name of Karl the Fog, we at the Clog have decided to name Berkeley’s own weather phenomenon Misty the Mist — who just so happens to be a cousin of Karl.
Who is Misty? She’s a passionate, educated, woke veil of condensation. To many UC Berkeley students, she’s an enigma. As smart as many of the students are, they just don’t understand meteorology. Misty may not be around as often as her cousin Karl, but that’s just because she’s a busy collection of water droplets and an overachiever who believes in doing more than just lazing around town.
Like all families, Karl and Misty have been through their share of drama. Whether it was the time Karl and Misty argued over which city was the best, when Karl embarrassed Misty at her 13th birthday sleepover party or when Misty “borrowed” some of Karl’s water supply, Karl and Misty are no strangers to family-friendly banter.
Of course, we at the Clog have got to rep Misty, as she represents Berkeley, and she’s a local favorite. While Karl may have 365K followers on Twitter, it’s only because Misty’s on a social media cleanse as of late. We wholeheartedly believe that once she’s ready, she’ll break the internet and become as colloquially relevant as her cousin, Karl.
While the name Karl was coined by an anonymous Twitter user years ago, we at the Clog, much like Misty, are bolder and more courageous — we have no shame in naming our weather system. The name Karl was inspired by the misunderstood giant in the Tim Burton film “Big Fish.” We’ve decided to name our mist Misty because not everyone has seen movies and understands popular culture. After all, what’s more Berkeley than cultural inclusivity? We also understand that Karl got a book deal, so if any publishers are interested in Misty’s stories of what she’s encountered from the depths of the Berkeley Marina to the hills of the Fire Trails, we’ll be in touch.
The world may not be ready for Misty, but much like her cousin Karl, she’s ready to spread out and become the next big thing. Literally.
This is a satirical article written purely for entertainment purposes.
Contact Zachary Abuel-Saud at [email protected].