There are many lists out there on the best order in which to watch all of the “Star Wars” films. These lists attempt to give the best introduction possible to people who are new to the galaxy far, far away. This article is not that. Instead, please enjoy the worst and most confusing order in which to watch the Skywalker saga (and the “Solo: A Star Wars Story” series).
“Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones”
The worst place for a new viewer to start a “Star Wars” marathon would have to be the film in the middle of its trilogy. Free from any iconic characters (besides Yoda) that a casual observer could identify, this film also has an incomprehensible opening crawl, so good luck getting your bearings with that.
“Star Wars: Episode VIII – The Last Jedi”
Now, the marathon will skip across time to a whole new era. The only character from the previous film on this list to show up is Yoda, and he’s glowing blue and not around for very long. This film also tries to subvert expectations about “Star Wars.” If you’re new to the franchise, however, you won’t have any questions, so it will come across as meaningless.
“Rogue One: A Star Wars Story”
This film comes with a new time period and new characters. At least this movie has Darth Vader, stormtroopers and the Death Star. Yet, this film will still be a bit confusing, as it works better if given the context of “Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope.”
“Solo: A Star Wars Story”
At this point in the list, we’re finally staying in one time period. The only problem is that all the characters are new again. So, you’re being introduced to new characters and vehicles, in a movie that was made for people who already loved these same characters and vehicles. It’s going to come off as weird. Also, the cameo at the end won’t make any sense, which will just add to your confusion.
“Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith”
At last, characters you’ll recognize! This film is here on this list to instead spoil all of the fun twists and reveals in the upcoming movies. It’ll be one big spoiler.
“Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope”
You’ve now been introduced to all the characters. So, it’s the perfect time to watch the movie that started it all. The original takes of these characters might just clash with your first impressions of them, which could ruin the film for you. That’s the goal, anyway.
“Star Wars: Episode VII – The Force Awakens”
Another time jump to a movie that ripped a lot of plot points from “Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope.” It’s 100% going to ruin your enjoyment, especially since “A New Hope” was literally the latest movie you watched in this marathon.
“Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace”
To keep this marathon out of whack, the list jumps back to the beginning of the saga (but not the first movie released, though). Watching this near the end of the marathon is about as out of place as this film can get. It’ll also introduce you to one or two new characters whose fates are pretty clear, given they haven’t shown up in any of the other movies.
“Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi”
The end of the original trilogy is placed here to spoil more details from “Star Wars: Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back” (the only film left in the original trilogy). It also clashes badly with the next movie in the marathon.
“Star Wars: Episode IX – The Rise of Skywalker”
Remember everything that happened at the end of “Return of the Jedi”? Well, now that has all been retconned. This movie shares many similarities with “Return of the Jedi,” so it will feel like having to rewatch a mediocre movie all over again. This time, just with different characters and questionable character choices.
“Star Wars: Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back”
At the end of this marathon is the film most people consider to be the best of the “Star Wars” movies. However, after having all of its major moments, character developments and reveals spoiled, it’ll probably be a difficult one to enjoy.
There you have it. Go out and subject yourself or some unwitting participants to this horrible marathon. Maybe you’ll still get some enjoyment out of it. May the Force be with you, always.
Contact Zachariah Nash at [email protected] .