I recently watched David Lynch’s Eraserhead for the first time
and the scene that stood out to me most was not Henry’s beheading or the alien child’s guts
Somehow
and it was at the very beginning
it was the shot in which Henry — the main character — is carrying groceries to his home
through an essentially a black-and-white industrial scene
and Henry is clutching his bag
and he is clutching it with both arms
and he is walking hurriedly when he steps in a hole in the mud —
that part struck me.
and it was at the very beginning
when after tripping in the hole and after lifting his shoe out of the hole
he spent some time looking at the ground .stopping.
and somehow this act foreshadowed and encapsulated Henry’s awkwardness
and Henry becomes equal parts unwilling and willing participant, but also detached observer
here he is all in order
and at the very beginning
in my mind, this short Auseinandersetzung with his surroundings constitutes — not really an Aha-moment
more of a huch-moment (read the ch as a guttural,
almost as if rolling an rrr at the back of your throat)
or a huh
As i was walking home i noticed
(anxiously playing with an acorn in my hand)
that i had become detached
as i had been focused on finding meaning in image
(i had started doing this at the very beginning of Eraserhead)
and i felt myself more observer — even though participant
And I think in moments
that in moments like Henry’s we become closer to being observers in that we briefly step outside ourselves
to consider, as Henry does,
from the very beginning, staring at the ground
“Why would he trip me like this?”
Auseinandersetzung is a German word meaning “fully engaging with a problem or thought,” but it implies an intensity as it can also be translated as “a conflict.”