BERKELEY'S NEWS • OCTOBER 01, 2022

The Clog's power ranking of popular cake flavors

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MARCO VERCH | CREATIVE COMMONS

(Photo by Marco Verch under CC BY 2.0)

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AUGUST 02, 2022

At any celebration, there will always be some sort of cake available to feast on. In my humble opinion, cake is one of the most enjoyable desserts. It’s always associated with good memories, too! However, not all cake flavors are born equal. There are some better flavors out there for sure. 

Here’s a power ranking of all the popular flavors of cake! I have a firm opinion about cake flavors, so don’t take this too personally. 

8. Black forest cake

If you like black forest cake, you’re probably a middle-aged person who likes the taste of rum. Why does my slice of cake taste bitter from the alcohol-soaked cake layer and sour from the weird mushy cherries? I made the mistake of searching for the prettiest cake I could find for my birthday cake last year, and since the black forest cake had cherries on top, I thought — why not? What a load of false advertising! I’ll admit that I was judging a book by its cover, and I’ve learned my lesson.

7. Strawberry shortcake

People who like strawberries tend to really like them. They’ll add these berries to every possible thing they can find. Now, I enjoy a lovely fresh strawberry on a warm summer day, but why is a whole chunk of strawberry in my slice of cake? I’m not a fan of fruit floating in my cake, and the weird, slightly tart flavors combined with the cream throw me off. Strawberry shortcake is cute to look at, but that’s all. 

6. Red velvet cake  

Okay, this might be highly controversial, but it has to be said. What even is red velvet cake? Is it chocolate? Is it some other magical flavor? I can’t even conjure in my brain what red velvet tastes like. All I taste is bland sugar. The only good part about red velvet is the cream cheese frosting, yum! But then why pair cream cheese flavor with a weak, confusing cake base? If I was handed a slice of red velvet cake, don’t get me wrong, I’d still eat it. Obviously. However, after I finish it, I’ll just be left with red teeth and confusion about what I’ve consumed.

5. Vanilla cake

Vanilla cake is so delicious when it’s made correctly. When the flavors are perfectly balanced, and the vanilla flavor can shine through — yum. However, eating white cake gets a bit boring sometimes. Like, why is my cake empty? Let’s mix it up a bit more!

4. Confetti cake

My favorite thing ever is cutting into a cake and seeing a fun explosion of rainbow sprinkles! Whenever I eat confetti cake, I think of being a child because of how nostalgic the flavor is. It just makes me so happy! Confetti cake is an upgraded version of vanilla cake, and because of its cuteness, it doesn’t disappoint me! Yet somehow, it certainly isn’t the best flavor out there. 

3. Cheesecake

If you’re lactose intolerant, shield your eyes! Cheesecake is so delicious. It’s creamy, smooth and has a subtle sweetness to it. Was anyone else into slime because the people who made cheesecake slimes were always my favorite. It was so fluffy and satisfying to watch! I used to dislike cheesecake because of the name, but then I realized how tangy and tasty it was! Don’t get me started on the graham cracker crust because I’ll never stop raving about the fantastic contrasting textures. 

2. Chocolate cake

Growing up, chocolate cake was the only cake flavor I would eat, and my love for chocolate cake hasn’t disappeared. Chocolate cake never lets me down. I am obsessed with those moist chocolate cakes paired with a silky and rich chocolate frosting — they’re simply perfect! If you’ve watched “Matilda,” I’m sure that you understand the appeal of a decadent chocolate cake.

1. Carrot cake

If you don’t like carrot cake, grow up. With that moist, sweet cinnamon cake and then pairing it with a tangy cream cheese frosting — it’s utterly perfect. There’s no carrot flavor at all if that’s off-putting to you. The carrots simply make the cake a luxurious texture, that’s it! There’s a reason why carrot cake is associated with old people because, after all, aren’t old people the wisest? If you can encapsulate the word divine into a cake, it would definitely be carrot cake. 

Writing this made me very hungry, and I could really go for a nice slice of cake right now. Hopefully you’ll celebrate something fun and have some cake soon!

Contact Annabel Chia at 

LAST UPDATED

AUGUST 02, 2022


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