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Red flags in a guy’s apartment 

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MARCH 23, 2023

Picture this, the guy you’ve been seeing for the past few weeks says he’s got the perfect restaurant for date night. The only catch, it’s across the street from his apartment. He subtly throws out the idea that you guys should meet up at his place prior to the date. He wants to introduce you to his prized parakeet. Seems legit enough? This is also the perfect opportunity to pick up on any red flags before you get any more attached. Here are the things you should be keeping an eye out for when entering his space. 

“Are you kidding me?! What do I dry my hands with?”

If you go to his bathroom and find no towels to dry your hands with, that should immediately start ringing some of your warning bells. Who doesn’t have anything to dry their hands with? You can’t tell me you like the feel of water droplets sliding down your arms into your sleeves. Well, it could be worse! He could’ve told you to dry your hands on your pants. 

“At least it’s the 3 in 1 Body Wash and not the 5 in 1.”

You had to take a peek into his shower while you were in there. It’s ok girl, we know why you did it. Your eyes don’t spot any pink or feminine products but they do land on the Old Spice 3 in 1 Hair and Body Wash. A simplistic man, who can blame him? But really, dude? Maturing is realizing each of these things does its job better separately

“I know I made eye contact with his roommates, maybe they’re just shy?”

If his roommates aren’t even turning around to glance at you, run right back out that door. You’re just another one of those nameless girls he brings into the apartment every Friday night. The one percent chance that they’re super shy doesn’t apply to your situation until further research is done. 

“No books? He’s not a big fan of reading.”

If he doesn’t have a single book anywhere in his place, you better not turn a blind eye. This should be a very clear indicator of the type of guy he is. It doesn’t even have to be a book with just words! Hell, comic books and manga at least tell me what he’s into. 

“Woah this place is completely clutter-free!”

Not necessarily a red flag but if his place reminds you of a sterilized room, he might be a neat freak. I’ll take clean over dirty any day but don’t overlook it.

“My fist fits through this hole in the wall, that’s odd.” 

Well, that screams anger issues. Unless he explains the hole in the wall with a very convincing story, heed this as a warning. 

Now that we’ve gone over some red flags together, the Clog hopes you have an easier time discerning them. I don’t take personal gratification from bashing men so we’ll do a gender role-reversed version the next time!

Contact Heidy Paniagua at 


MARCH 23, 2023