Off the beat: Show up to parties on time, idiots
My only two friends are bottles: a Jack Daniels fifth and a whiskey mixer. They’re sitting together, a perfect pair, as I recline in my chair, alternating swigs from each. A glass full of whiskey sour lies untouched near my feet. My eyes glaze over into a soft focus. I’m half concentrated on the Xbox game I’m playing and half concentrated on the question of when to take my next swig from the whiskey bottle.